You Don't Have Me

Chapter 14

It was the most awkward moment. Tyler's eyes were staring directly into your soul, and you didn't know what to do. The only thing you felt like doing was crying. He was waiting for you to say it back but you were so overwhelmed by the current situation you just couldn't.

And, when you didn't, he lost it. Audibly sighing, Tyler ripped his wallet out of his pocket, throwing a one hundred dollar bill on the table before storming out of the restaurant, huffing and puffing all the way to his car. You were scrambling trying to follow him. But, also you were trying move calmly trying not to disturb the other restaurant patrons. The ones who weren't already looking at you.

"T, can we talk about this?" You asked as you stood not he sidewalk, watching him get into his car, hesitant as to how he would respond.

"I love you, but I can't talk to you right now!" He said, his hands clutching on to his car keys so tight that his hand was going white. He got in the car, and you continued to watched him, not sure if you were supposed to be going with him. But you were still frozen at the fact that he had once again told you he loved you.

It was something you had waited what had felt like a lifetime to hear. You felt bad for not saying it back, as it wasn't a matter of you not loving Tyler. But, thats not the way it was supposed to happen. The two of you weren't supposed to be fighting when the first "I love you," was said. It should have happened during a kiss int he rain, or a whisper late at night after he thought you had fallen asleep.

Sighing, you watched as he pulled out of the parking lot before speeding away, and you spent a moment trying to collecting yourself before getting in your car and driving back to your house. But, to let your mind wander a little bit and most to process what had just happened, you took the long way home. And, as you drove more and more you got angrier and angrier. You couldn't just leave it like this, especially not when he was leaving for Canada in two days. So you decided, the two of you were going to have it out here and now.

Your head turned looking left and right, checking for oncoming traffic as you turned your car around, heading for Tyler's house. You were only three minutes away, and as you drove you planned out in your mind what you were going to say, and boy, was it good.

You pulled into his driveway, grabbed your purse and slammed the door of your car, before marching up to his door. You knocked so har you could of sworn you broke your knuckle. It took him a minute, but Tyler finally opened the door. His eyes scanning you as he held the door, barely ajar, just open enough for his body to fit in the door frame.

"I told you, I don't want to talk to you right now." He dismissed you before trying to shut the door. You caught it, making your presence and the fact that you weren't leaving until this was over, known.

"You don't get to make that decision, especially after you just humiliated me in at that restaurant!" You walked further into his house, your arms flailing as you pushed past his large body that was blocking the door. "You sleep with people all the time! I don't get what the big deal is."

"The big deal is that I don't lie to you about who I sleep with." His arms crossed as he spoke.

"I never lied about anything!" You yelled.

His mouth jutted open as his eyes practically leapt from his head. "Well, I've never slept with anyone to hurt to you!"

"You don't think watching you fuck random girls for years hurt me?" You yelled in complete disbelief. "Are you fucking kidding?"

With that his face softened, realizing how you must felt. "I ne-" He stopped, unable to justify his actions, not only to you, but to himself. Never, had he thought about you when he had been with other girls. Well, that was a lie because you were all he thought of, but never in a way of hurting you.

"I'm sorry." Tyler whispered. You nodded, feeling the tears form in your eyes. He took a step closer to you, now being close enough to touch you. He reached for your hand, and every sense of strength you were using to conceal the sobs you didn't want to let out tonight went away, and one slipped out. Tyler paused for a moment, his hand frozen in the air, before reaching it up to your cheek, brushing away the tear, moving almost in slow motion. Your eyes rose slowly, meeting his, searching them for, well you didn't know. But, you knew you needed something- a sign. And, in the moment, his lips found yours, as his hand tucked a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. Your eyes finally closing, surrendering yourself to him.

This was it- this was your sign.

Suddenly, he pulled you closer to him, your bodies now resting against one another, taking in the moment. It wasn't the best kiss the two of you had shared, but it was the most meaningful.

"Do you-" He didn't even have to finish his thought, before you were nodding in response, knowing that he was asking if you wanted to move to the couch. You could feel his hands on the back of your thighs and you met him half way, wrapping your arms around his neck, almost lifting yourself onto him. He walked a few steps over to the charcoal sofa, before sitting down, you still on top of him. As soon as Tyler was on the couch, your hands found the hem of his shirt, trying to lift it off. The two of you paused just for a brief second, allowing the fabric to pass over his head, before pressing your lips back onto his. As things started to get escalate, he laid down allowing you to lay on top of him, controlling the kisses shared between the two of you.

"You know." He whispered against your lips. "You never said it back." You pulled away from him, propping yourself up onto his chest, your eyes falling, and you could see that he needed to hear the words come from your mouth. And, as bad as it sounded and as bad as you wanted to say them, you just couldn't. Not here. Not tonight.

"Do you think that's really what's going to fix this?" You exhaled.