Call Me Simon

Chapter 10

Simon

I had to invite Elio over because...he is literally the best. I think I obsess over him a little too much. But I think that's okay because I am his boyfriend. I bet he obsesses over me all the time. But, as I think of it, he really doesn't show or express his love for me verbally. It's fine if he wants to keep it to himself. I just get a little worried. I know I shouldn't but that's how I feel. I don't know, maybe I'm being paranoid.

Elio says he has to go downstairs. I say okay and he leaves. I don't know why, but I decide to grab his jacket. I put it on. It feels warm and I start to smile. I feel happier in his jacket. I feel like a different person in it for some reason. I feel something in the pocket of his jacket. At first, I thought it was his pill bottle. I take it out and it's a little brown notepad. I don't want to look inside but according to my name, I kinda have to. I noticed that there are a few ripped pages. I don't even want to know why they are ripped. I flip through all of these pages and I honestly think I'm about to cry.

"My moon"

"Good morning, Angel."

"I love you."

"I'll always be there for you."

"Why are you so great to me?"

"I'm never going to leave my listener and watcher."

"I don't want to leave you either."

"Simon, you're going to be the death of me someday, and I can't wait."

I can't believe he wrote all of these things. And about me. He called me his Moon. He loves me. He really, really loves me. I don't know what to say. I feel like the world shifted a little. He wrote all of this. I can't believe that I ever had my doubts.

I turn around and I see Elio.

"Hey." he says.

I don't say anything.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

Without saying anything, I immediately walk up to him and hug him. Out of nowhere, I start to cry into his shoulder.

"What happened?" he asks.

"I love you so much, Elio." I say.

"I love you too." he says. "What happened?"

I let go of him and show him his notepad.

"Oh. You looked through it?" he asks.

I nod. Tears still in my eyes. "Why didn't you tell me this before?"

Elio sighs. "I don't know. I guess, I was too shy to tell you all of this. So I wrote it in this." he points to the notepad.

I smile a little. "You really care about me."

"Why wouldn't I?" he asks.

"I don't know. I get worried like that. I always think that way. I guess, I thought that I was more into this relationship than you were." I say.

"You really thought that?" he asks.

"I sound stupid, I know." I say.

"No. It's kinda great to know that something so put together as you can have broken cracks. I thought I was the only one who was flawed. Now, I know that I'm not." he says.

I hug him again. I'm happy he thinks that way. I didn't want to tell him how I felt and then he leaves me. I don't ever want to lose him. It kinda balances out because Elio doesn't want to lose me. I want to run away with him. I want to be able to yell to the world that Elio is mine. I want to be with him for the rest of my life.