Nicole's POV
I'm sitting on my bed, texting Harry when there is a knock on my door.
"Come in!"
The door knob turns and in walks the person I'm least expecting: Niall. I'm actually happy to see him; needless to say the last few days have been awkward between us and he's been avoiding me. I feel completely and utterly horrible, but now I have a chance to apologize.
"Niall, I'm so sorry about what happened, it's just there's been a lot of stuff going on that I've had to cope with, and I don't know if I want to be in a relationship just yet, but I love you as a best friend and I really don't want anything to change between us," I say sincerely.
"I understand. I've been thinking a lot about everything lately, and Liam also had told me that you needed your space right now because of some other problems that you're having. And if you don't like me back, it's fine, I know I shouldn't have gotten upset because I can't force you to love me back. And if you need any help with what you're going through, I'm always here."
Uh oh. How much did Liam tell Niall? I don't know, but the fact that Niall forgave me is what matters now. I pull him in for a tight hug, and after a couple of seconds, he hugs me back equally tight.
I smile and say, "Friends?"
He grins and replies, "Best friends," pulling me in for another hug.
"Oh by the way, how much did Liam tell you about what I'm going through?" I ask, gulping.
"Nothing really, just what I just told you."
"Oh."
Well, if Niall and I are 'friends' again, I guess I owe him the truth anyway, because I considered, well still consider, him as a brother to me.
"Niall, I'm going to tell you something now. The only people who know are Jess and Liam. They found out about it the other night by accident, but I feel like I owe you an explanation. Just please don't tell anyone, okay?" He nods and I take a deep breath, thinking through what I'm going to say.
"When I was younger, my father raped me, quite a few times. I went to the authorities a few months ago, and that's why he's in jail. Not because of DUI multiple times, which is what my mother forced me to tell everyone. To cope with that, and being kicked out of the house, I began cutting myself."
I hold up my arm to show Niall the scars that I usually cover with bracelets or long sleeves. He breathes in deeply and sits there, stunned.
"I guess it became so much of a habit that I was doing it regularly because I was insecure, or something that I felt like I couldn't deal with happened. And it became almost an addiction, an escape."
Niall begins to speak, but I shake my head.
"There's more. I used to be made fun of for being overweight, and as a result, I started throwing up almost everything I ate, or not eating at all. I guess I was, and still am, obsessed with looking perfect, which means working out a lot, and not eating right. And even though I know I've lost too much weight, I still see myself as fat and ugly and I just..." I trail off as I start crying.
Niall's cheeks are glistening with tears also.
"Nicole, I really had no idea. But if you need anything, I'm here to help, I promise."
"Thanks, Niall, but all that I ask is that you don't tell anyone. I'm trying to get better, I haven't cut in almost a week and I haven't thrown up either, but I'm still eating really small amounts of food. I'm working on it, but it takes time, I just can't be pressured. So now that you know, please treat me normally, and I promise I'll work hard to get better," I say in one breath.
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I Want To Be Your Reason To Be (One Direction Fan Fiction)
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