Reason 12

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Reason 12:
The envy.

I've always been jealous of happy people.

That's the main goal in life, right?  Happiness? I have never truly understood the feeling of love and happiness, because I've rarely felt it.

Holding hands, arms wrapped around my torso, a boy telling me I'm beautiful. That's what I wanted.

I never thought I was the jealous type, it's a trait I don't show on my skin. But when deprived of all I ever wanted, green clouds my vision.

That's why I was so latched on to the idea of liking you. I wanted to convince myself that there was hope when there wasn't.

Was it so hard to find someone who could like me?

I guess so.

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