The Collection of Shit About "Him"

Secret Romantic

Secret Romantic

Hello. My name’s Anonymous 

And I am a hopeless romantic.

I hide it because I feel guilty.

I’m not a romantic in the sense that I believe bullshit 

Like soul mates or love at first sight.

But I do believe in love.

No my sin is romanticizing people and the past. 

When around people I imagine them as more or even better than they actually are.

I ignore the things I dislike and instead solely focus on the things I love.

That is why I fell so far into the rabbit hole when it came to him.  

I didn’t think he was perfect and I saw the problems there.

But I pushed the warning signs away and ran for higher ground. 

I focused on things I liked and not the things depressing me. 

I do the same when I look back on my time in wonderland. 

I think of all the things I should have or could have said. 

When I know none of it matters. 

I know all I want to is forget him but I keep letting myself think about the past and then the present is like a cold shower. I think about him and his real girlfriend and it shouldn’t matter what happens to them but it bothers me. I think of holidays and time spent together. I think of smiles and tears. I romanticize their relationship even. How dramatic the day she finally gets smart to his cheating ways. The day he gets bored and trys to get in contact with me. The day I see them and he looks ashamed. But reality has to kick in at some point. My life is not some well written novella. My life is normal and messy, like me. The best thing to do is learn the lesson and move on. Realize I’ll never get me hollywood ending to this time in my life. Realize I am better off without him and without thinking about him. 

I still believe in love. I still want it. I know I’ll have it. I know it will never be with someone like him.

Hello. My Name’s Anonymous.