Maria

Chapter 8

Cason

The dreams come every night, haunting the pathways of sleep and waiting for my eyes to close. It's always the same dream; the operating table, the smell of clean metal and the faces of my surgeons. A new surgeon is there, she has black hair and a pale face, the mask covers her freckles. Above the mask I can see her dark eyes looking at me. I recognise her from the fair the day before.

Her name is Maria. Maria the silent girl.

I wake suddenly, confused at the fact that my dream was different. It has always been the same dream, up until now.  As I get dressed I realise that Maria's life now is the same as my past.

When I was born, I was diagnosed with Mutism. For me it wasn't a lifestyle choice but a curse, I wanted so badly to speak again. That's why I signed up to be a guinea pig in an experiment. A company had gotten hold of this new equipment and they needed a willing subject. My parents thought I was crazy maybe I was, all I know is that I did what I had to do to speak again.

I remember the day so clearly; I woke up the sound of my Mum's cheesy disco music and the smell of freshly baked cinnamon buns. The smell floated up the stairs and through the cracks of my bedroom door, filling the room with a mouthwatering aroma. My stomach growled in hunger as I made my way down the stairs and entered the kitchen.

"Mum... you know I'm not supposed to eat before the operation." I signed to her, as much as I loved my Mum's cinnamon buns- they would have to wait.

"Oh," she said with a disappointed look "I guess I'll just have to eat them all myself then." She took a big bite from the cinnamon bun in her hand, laughing loudly at my alarmed face.

"Go and get dressed then, off you pop we leave in fifteen minutes." Mum took another bite of her cinnamon bun.

"What if it doesn't work Mum? What if I have to live like this for the rest of my life?" I signed the sentence slowly as my Mum was still learning sign language.

"Baby, there was always going to be that chance, sometimes you've got to take risks for the things you want." She said, finishing off her cinnamon bun and giving me a tight smile. 

"It'll be alright love, don't worry." she said as she shooed me off to get dressed.

Fifteen minutes later I was in the  car with a stomach full of butterflies and a heart beating a hundred miles an hour. As we pulled up to the hospital I swallowed the bile that was slowly rising in my throat. Even though I hadn't eaten anything in the last ten hours, my stomach was heavy and wriggling like snakes in a cage.

Another ten minutes after that and we were waiting for my name to be called. My name buzzed up on the screen. This was it, It was finally time. After they took me into the operating theatre, all I could remember was the look of the light on the operating equipment and the smell of clean rubber gloves. They placed a mask over my mouth and it all went black.

Recovery was difficult. I had to spend another two weeks in hospital to train my voice box. Everything was a success and with a little help from Carrie; my speech trainer, I was ready to go. The lessons were difficult but everyday my voice got a little bit louder and my spirit a little brighter, I was finally talking.

Since everything was a success, the company carried on doing their operations on willing Mutes, I was back home and everything was great. I carried on using sign language because it's a piece of my past and I can't forget it; life is this big jigsaw puzzle and you can't see the full picture until you have all the pieces. 

Being a Mute is more than one of my pieces. Mutism has laced it's way through my life. I can't forget, if I did it would mean losing over half of my jigsaw and starting from scratch. The pieces are there, and they will be for the rest of my life.

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This chapter was a bit longer than usual because I got a request to make them a bit longer ;)

It's been a while since I've updated, I'm sorry but please comment and let me know how you like the new character Cason.