Dark Thoughts

A War Inside My Head

    You aren’t who you think you are.

Why do you try?

Shut up

I can’t do that darlin. I’ll keep talking till you drop dead.

Why can’t you just leave me alone? Let me enjoy life?

Because you’re a worthless being on this earth that’s taking up air and space that others need more than you. It’s not like you’re important.

I AM IMPORTANT. I AM IMPORTANT TO HIM AND MY FRIENDS

Your friends could care less about you. They don’t need you. You’re just the friend to keep around because you;re naive. You’re just background noise, honey.

That’s not true.

YOU KNOW IT IS.  THEY DON’T NEED YOU. WHY DO YOU THINK THEY FORGET YOU?

YOU

ARE

NOTHING

TO

THEM.

. . . What about him? He loves me, he makes sure I’m okay, he’s there whenever I need him.

He’s going to leave you eventually. Honestly, you trust to easy, then fall too hard. Look at what happened last time. Once he graduates. You’ll be nothing  more than smoke in his memory.. You’re a worthless piece of shit that doesn’t know how to defend herself.

Shut up, Chrys.

Aww, is the damsel in distress finally caving to my words? They’re all true, darling. Don’t deny it.

It’s not true. He loves me, I am worth something.

WHY DO YOU FIGHT BACK? YOU CAN’T WIN AGAINST ME, R. YOU’LL FALL BACK INTO THE CYCLE, AND NOBODY WILL HELP YOU. LOOK AT ERIKA AND ALEC. THEY WOULDN’T HELP YOU EVEN IF YOU BEGGED THEM TO. LESLIE AND YASMIN HAVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS TO DEAL WITH. AND YOUR LOVER? YOU DON’T WANT TO BOTHER HIM WITH YOUR PROBLEMS BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE YOU’RE A BURDEN TO  HIM . SO YOU SIT IN SILENCE, FIGHTING A WAR IN YOUR HEAD THAT YOU CAN’T WIN.

. . . you’re right. .

I know I am, honey. I know.

.

.

.

.

That’s why i’ve taken control of you for a while.