THEY TAKE ME AWAY
'Your eyes tell a different story. My heart tells the other.'
This is a bit short but hope you guys like it anyway.
***
Your eyes tell a different story. My heart tells the other. All the words that I wish to hear are painted on your lips. But even if I hear them, I no longer hold them to be true.
The image is a lie. A bare canvas. And I'm holding the brush up to touch it but I break off in the middle. Not moving forward. Just moving backwards. Sometimes, so still. I wish to hear the sound of your whispers, something so refreshing about it. But I don't know if I can hear another lie slip through those lips.
It's all a misunderstanding. And I'm confused as to why my heart wishes to back away. From this, you. I wonder for a moment if it's because it doesn't love you. And I laugh at the realisation that in actuality it loves you too much. Too much for me to stand in front of you long enough to want to pull away. To hate you.
But it's an impossible task to do. And my heart knows that somewhere deep within too. It's not that I'm scared to see in the eye of the truth. No, I'm scared to look at you. Because pain and mistakes reflect off your surface and your eyes still hold what I wish to be true.
I'm falling down the dark pits of hell. The pain crippling and swift. Grappling me in their holds and paralysing me in their wake. In the silence that's pulling away at my insides every day, I feel that petrifying emotion. It reminds me too much of my own self. Or someone I used to be.
I want to wrap my hands around my past's neck and scream at her to go away. But I'm too tired and scared to do so. I'm wondering if my shadows have consumed me. Again. If they were waiting for this moment. If they were waiting to do this. If they never forget me.
I remember you. Everything about you. And I can't decide whether to smile or to succumb to the darkness. I remembered what happened and I knew the answer, it came naturally to me.
They never left in the first place. Because I never confronted them.
Never.
***
I know it's short but thanks for reading!
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