Dell's Journey

Chapter 7: Meeting Humphrey

   It was around 7:13pm when the phone rang and Dell,

nervous tingles racing up and down his spine, picked up the

receiver.

"Hello?"

"Dell? Hey, it's Rian."

"Hey! What's up?"

"Sorry it's so late, I had to finish this paper and I

just now got it done."

"Oh that's fine, I'm just hanging out," said Dell, who

had not been calmly hanging out, but rather had spent the

afternoon adjusting the minutia of his appearance. "You

still want to do something?" he asked, as though any

response would have been all right.

"Sure, yeah. You want to get something to eat? Did

you already eat?"

"No, not yet."

"Do you want to come here and then we'll go? Or do

you want to meet somewhere – I could meet you somewhere."

Both parties were really good at this.

"Uh, sure, no I'll come get you. How do I get there?

You're in for a treat, you know. You've never ridden in

the Relica. It's really quite the carriage," he said,

satisfied by his wit. The "Relica" was the name of his

1987 Toyota Celica, which was beige and somewhat

unreliable, but unconditionally loved.

Directions were given. Plans solidified.

Explanations were offered regarding the word "Relica."

Phones were returned to their recharging base-units.

Cologne was lightly sprayed. Nerves were elevated, and

Dell's propensity for heavy sweating influenced his final

wardrobe change. He settled upon a long-sleeved, dark-blue

zip-front sweater, chosen for its special ability to

conceal perspiration.

"Look, Dell," he spoke to himself in slow, soothing

tones, "Just relax and be normal. Be yourself. That's

what people want. They want real, normal people who are

honest and who are not always trying to impress them."

This is actually pretty true, though it did not reassure

Dell in the least.

Rian lived in an early 1980's ranch-style suburban

home about 11 minutes from Dell's house. It was lighter

beige than the Relica, and it looked quite pleasant, with

slender young maple trees in the front yard and what

appeared to be a poplar peaking over the roof from behind.

The clouds had drifted in since the afternoon and the air

had the clammy, unsettled feeling of impending rain. It

was one of Dell's favorite meteorological conditions.

Dell walked as confidently as possible up the exposed

aggregate walkway, trying his best to be normal. He

deliberately followed its curve to the left around a

Japanese maple, as if staying on the path secured his

position as a reasonable and responsible date.

1. The doorbell

2. Sounds of the family dog

3. The voice of a girl amongst others

4. Footfalls making their way onto the hardwood floor of

the entry-way.

The tense ritual of waiting at a strange door is as

familiar as it is unpleasant. He knew he would have to

come in and meet parents and probably have some difficult

encounter with the dog where he would reassure everyone

that the dog was just fine (even though it had jumped up on

him and got some saliva on his belt). No, the dog was cute

when it was "so excited", and he didn't mind a bit. He

would wash his hands later.

What am I doing here? I don't even know this person!

Take a deep breath.

Rian was at the door. She smiled and lost her hold on

the door as the dog pushed his way into the space between

the doorjamb and the semi-open screen-door.

"No! Humphrey! Come here!" she implored, grabbing

the red leather collar around his neck. "Sorry, he just

likes to know who everybody is, don't you Humphrey? He's

really nice, he won't bite or anything. If someone broke

in he'd probably just want attention from them."

"That's fine, I don't mind. Um, should I come in or-"

"Sure, come in."

The glass screen-door banged shut behind him, so to

make amends he very gently closed the front door with as

little noise as possible. He didn't really know if it was

his job or not. He wandered into the kitchen. Humphrey

sniffed and repeatedly tried to jump up, receiving rebukes

for his efforts. Dell didn't have pets.

He met everyone. They actually seemed pretty nice and

pretty normal. Humphrey provided a much-appreciated social

lubricant, as pets and small children often do. All in all

the time spent in Rian's house equaled about 6 minutes, and

then they exited and settled into the Relica's plush faux

fur front seats.