BTS poetry [I'm a sad drunk]

Singularity

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*** I dumped myself into the lake. ***

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*** I buried my voice for you. ***

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In my ear. A sound. The sound of unfamiliarity. I awoke. From my bed I had rose. But now I'm restless. I can't sleep. I try to cover my ears. I try to shield myself. But I'm stuck sleepless. Tired, drained. The pain in my throat stays. I rap my fingers around my throat. I want to scream, I want to speak. I don't have a voice. I can't tell you how I feel, what I think. I'm blinded and drowned out by the society we live in. I can't escape. A never ending ring. Again and again. I buried my voice, my speech. What you hear isn't me. This is for you. I did this all for you. A crack against the frozen lake that I threw myself into. In the water I had laid. A layer of ice had formed. drowning me, thickening, pushing me further down. This was my dream. My pain a phantom. My fate had been placed. Had I lost myself? Or had you found the real me. When I run to the lake, I see myself. The ice will try to cover my mouth again. But you will come. My spring will melt the ice.

Tell me if this is my voice I hear.

Tell me if I shouldn't have thrown myself in this lake.

Tell me if the pain I feel is fake.

What was I supposed to do back then?