Apologies | Sinrin [HIATUS]

Apologies: Chapter 1

Taehyung's POV

"Yah! Yerin! What the hell are you thinking staying at a bar at this time huh?!"

God! I don't even know, I just found myself running at random places trying to search for Yerin when she's not answering my phone calls. I've got a message from Eunha earlier that says she is still not home. For God's sake it's freaking 1 in the morning already. And I found her here, drinking alone. What is she doing really?!

"Let's just go home, everyone is worried about you." I grabbed her hand trying to stop her from having another sip of alcohol from the glass that she is holding.

"Let go of me!" she pulled her hand away and turned her gaze at me, her eyes cold and stolid as always. "And why should I obey you?" she then returned drinking without even waiting for my response.

"Please Yerin, stop that already. Let's just go home so you can also rest."

"Just get the fuck out of here." she said not taking her eyes away from what she is doing.

"Can you please tell me why you are drinking alone? Is there something bothering you? Is there something that I can help?"

I know she won't just drink out of nowhere without proper reason. She's not that kind of person. I know her.

"It's nothing. Why do you care?"

"Is it because of what happened a few days ago?" I asked, hoping that she would let out a proper answer. "I am sorry for that".

"Can you just leave? It's none of your business. And I'm not planning to tell you anything. I don't have the reason to tell you anyway. And don't feel so close to me just because you are friends with my sister okay?" she finished off her sentence with traces of irritation and then letting out a long sigh.

Yeah. Right. I'm just a lowly person who have great feelings for a person as amazing as her. And I'm pretty sure she doesn't even recognize me as a comely person. I forgot about that for a brief time. I'm so dumb.

But I can't just also sit there when I can do something for her. I'm just worried for her. But I guess it just brought her discomfort.

Sigh. What will I do in my life?

"Ah, yes. I'm sorry. Just control your drinking okay? And ahm.... I'm gonna take my leave." I conceded while hanging my heads down trying to avoid her scourge figure entering my sight again.

As soon as I exited the place I immediately texted Eunha.

To Eunha:

I already found Yerin. She's currently in the bar a few blocks away from my place,  drinking alone. Please get her now.

Even with her harsh disposition towards me, it won't stop me from caring for her.

No, never.

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Yerin's POV

That Taehyung guy is seriously odd. He always follows me around or just pops out of nowhere.

I hate him.

He acts like he knew what am I going through but infact he doesn't really know even a bit of it.

Hey!!! Yerin-ah!!! Wake up!!! Just hang in there! We're almost there! Don't give up!

His voice echoed in my head. It's just sad, how people wanted me to live and are trying their best helping me out but amidst of all that I just want to die.

He saved me when I wanted to die.

Why?

It's like I jumped out of a cliff and he grabbed my hand when I am halfway down just to lift me up again.

When I thought dying is better than living, when I thought that I could escape living through this hell. Just when I thought I could finally leave, he... he brought me back again. He destroyed all of my expectations.

He made me bear the pain of living again.

I really do hate him.

"Hey! Faster!"  I am hearing a laugh coming from a girl with unknown identity as she runs away from me. I don't know but I suddenly felt the urge to follow her. I am trying to cope up with her fast paced action, but I couldn't.

No matter how fast I run to her it seems impossible for me to reach her because as I saw the distance between us is closing, she would run faster making the gap between us lose its point on meeting.

I am desperately running for her to the point that I almost stumbled down, but it still looks like I am not getting any close to her, more like I am just getting further away to her. I reached out my hand hoping that I could touch her, but I touched nothing but the empty void between us.

I called her out, pleading her to stop running away, but she didn't even look back at me.

"Please." I beg for the the last time.

She finally looked back at me, for the first time, "You shouldn't have done it. You should keep holding on."  After that I felt like she smiled at me, even though I cannot see her face because all I can really see is a silhouette. But I am sure that she smiled. It's all that before she disappeared into thin air and I was now left alone in this dark void.

Argh! Those memories are occupying my mind again. I hate it. I have been experiencing this for so long but I can't even get out of this miserable antipathy.

Tsk. Really? A psychiatrist who can't even treat her own mental illness. I guess I am really that useless.

I need someone to help me. Someone that can give me the meaning of those memories.

"You shouldn't have done it. You should keep holding on"

Does she know about it? Is she referring to that time when I tried to kill myself? What the heck. I don't really know.

I don't know. But maybe she can help me. Wait- is she even real? Or just some random characters that my impractical mind created?

Seriously...

Who are you?