Girl meets world: im only Human.

"I knew it."

WARNING: INNAPROPRIATE... NESS! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

Afterschool, I went to my locker and put away my back pack.

I went to the front and actually expected to be pulled into the janators closet when I passed it. But for the first time, when I walked by. nothing happened.

I actually stood outside the door bewildered, then just shrugged. im finally going to be on time to work. I thought feeling my sprits lifted.

I went to the laundrymat and tried opening the door, but it wouldnt open and I noticed a note on the door that said:

"Sorry, but we are not open today. Had a family emergency."

The laundrymat was a family bussness and small so a family emergency would be a big deal.

seriously? the One time i show up on time?... If only I had a family.

as i turned and walked off I swear, I felt someone watching me. like there was someone following me or something. But I just pushed that away because I remembered I can sometimes be paranoid.

I walked home and was for the first time ever.... happy. and I WASNT faking. I could finally go home, write music, go to bed at a good time. get a good nights sleep, and finally get to school on time.

I got up to the apartment, unlocked the door, and stepped inside.

but when I turned to shut the door, I saw someone leaning on the door frame.

Mr. Matthews.

My eyes widened in fear. "uh, Mr matthews?" my voice shaked.

"maya." he greeted back with a small smirk.

"wh- What are you doing here?" I asked instinct making me back away but he followed me inside.

"you were late to my class again Mrs. Hart. really late."

I began backing my way twords the only room in the house in hopes of locking the door and then going out the window. My moms room. Yeah thats right. I dont have a bathroom. But Something told me something was wrong.

"I-im Sorry. But I promise ill be on time tomarow." I answered just as i reached my mothers room. I tried shuting the door but he held it open with One hand.

he was a full grown Man. while I was a starved kid. I was weak. he was strong. I didnt stand a chance.

"oh im sure you will." he said. "but, your going to have to pay first."

"how?" I asked even though I had a feeling What the answer was.

But he didnt answer. He forced me to the bed making me go down with a hard slam with his weight hurting my chest.

"be a good machine, maya." he said making my heart sink.

"I knew it. it was you the whole time."

I couldnt just let this happen. I tried pushing him off me but he grabbed my wrists and held them down.

"like I said maya. 'be a good machine.'  behave If you wanna me to leave you here alive" he warned.

the thought of death seemed rather pleasant. At least I wont have to go through hell everyday. I wont be hungry anymore.

But as much as I wanted to die. I knew that It was no use to fight back. I let out an exhausted sigh of dispare and let my body relax to show I surrendered.

"good machine." Mr. matthews said making me wish I were dead.

I felt utterly ashamed as he took off my clothes then his and got on top of me and started moving against me. all I could do was just lay there closing my eyes wishing it were over.

Is this What happened all those countless times when everything went black? why am I still awake? does his wife know about this? I wish this were over. I wish I were dead.

Mr. matthews began like... making this noise. I dont know how to describe it but it was really weird and desturbing and it made me embarassed. I tried to zone him out and think about other things like... my song:

I can hold my breath

I can bite my tounge

I can... give you all I am.

that doesnt ryhme. I know.

note: again, me the author, I do not own this song!

After... I dont know how long, he stopped. But he didnt get off of me. instead he reached over and grabbed something.  i couldnt see what he was doing but then i felt something sharp go into my arm.

The pain was unbearable and i let out a cry as a tear fell down my cheeks.

Finally, he got off of me and put on his clothes and left without saying a word.

But I was too terrified to move. I just layed there... with no clothes on as i heard the door shut.

But even after I knew he was gone I couldnt move. I was petrified. I couldn't beleive what had happened.

I looked down with just my eyes and saw new open bleeding slits in my arms. first he follows me home, then he does.... THAT and then he cuts me? what did I do to deserve that?

i swallowed hard feeling myself shake and i took a deep breath trying to calm myself down. After a few minutes of just laying there, I took another deep breath, got up and got dressed.

I left my mothers room and went out to the living room, sat on the couch and took out my journal.

I opened up my journal and wrote down the lyrics I decribed above accidentally getting a little blood on the pages.

I couldnt clean the cuts. my mother never DID pay the water Bill.

I sighed looking up at the clock that read 7:32. just then I noticed a note on the coffee table from you know you and I picked it up.

"remember, you cant tell anyone. no one's going to believe someone like you."

what does he mean my "someone like me?" Hes supposed to be my teacher. Hes supposed to teach me about life and help me. But instead, he just breaks me down.

I then turned back to my journal and thought for a second then wrote:

your words in my head

knives in my heart,

you build me up and then I fall apart

im only human

I then decided I might as well get some sleep since I was uttery exhausted. I layed down on the couch and tried to ignore my stinging arms but I couldnt get to sleep.

The pain was unbearable and images kept flowing though my mind as I tossed and turned.

be a good machine.

noones going to beleive someone like you.

What a loser.

I sat up in a cold sweat breathing heavily and screamed. and looked up at the clock to see it was now 12:37.

the one time im on time for work.

yeah... I feel like people are going to hate me now. But dont get me wrong about cory, hes litteraly one of my favorite characters. Im not trying to be inappropriate or something but... yeah. I feel nervous about this story. but dont worry, this story has a happy ending. I actually have it all planned out. Well see you next time.

NOTE: this chapter is probrably the most inappropriate one. so... yeah.