Chasing Dreams

Chapter 19

After how many years I guess, finally Daegu Im here!
My mind keeps on repeating it as soon as we entered Daegu. Taehyung and I just separated ways tho, we're not neighbors.

The moment my feet touches the land of Daegu, everything in my past just keeps on flashing back.

Those days.. Those past memories that keeps on taunting me for many years. That heartache that's breaking me emotionally but pushes me through. Why??? I still have many questions WHY. My life has been very sad after those years. Yes, I pursue my dreams to make music because that fucking pain pushed me through. She is still the reason why I wrote sad music.
She is the reason why I wrote LET ME KNOW! She is the reason of those painful lyrics behind that perfect beat. She'd hurt me like hell!

And she is also the reason why Im back here in this place. She's the reason why I need to look for myself. The real meaning and value of my own existence after that misery.

I went to a floating restaurant somewhere here in Daegu all by myself. I need sometime here alone just to fix myself up and pick up those peices of me.

I stare at the calm and peaceful lake.

Why does everything in this world is so complicated??

Just like this lake that Im starring at. It may seemed to be silent and peaceful but it hides the darkest misery.

After all these years, the pain is still here. But.... what does she means to me??? What does Ella means to me??? Im still so confused. Ugh!

I scratched the back of my head. Then, the waiter finally had my order. Well, I just ordered a pancake and a strawberry syrup and a cup of espresso.

And talking about strawberries, yeah it made me smile, thinking about strawberries reminds me of her.
She's just too adorable and unique on her own way.

After some time staying at the floating restaurant, I dedcided to walk on my way home.

AS I WAS in my way walking home, I stopped to a nearby park. I stare at those swing and sesaws. This place used to be our meeting place with Ji Yeonhe.

Yes, Ji Yeonhe. She used to be my love, my everything, my very first love. My first heartache.

We used to came here right after school before. This place used to be my happiest place not until she broke up with me and left as if nothing happened. I gave her my heart and she took it away from me and broke it into pieces like shit.

My world turns into a darkest whole. Im broke. So broke. So I decided to leave this place trying to bury the heartache I felt in the past and go on as if I was still a whole.

I auditioned at BigHit became a trainee, debuted and slowly making a history. Yes, I still pursue my dreams on making music to let her listen to the songs I've made which tells how devastated I am, how I cope up and moved forward and let my life go on. At first, everything wasn't that easy for me. I became depressed. Then, she came into my life as if she was the one who is destined to make me happy. And she did. I am very thankful to her, for making my life exciting each and every day.

"Guys, labas naman tayo oh? Nabo-bore na talaga ako dito eh." sabi bigla ni Liz.

"Saan ba naman tayo pupunta?" tanong ko.

"Can we just go to Cheonggu? Since malapit lang din naman yun dito eh." simpleng sagot lang ni Jhen at sumang ayon di naman kami.

Habang papunta dun ay bigla ko siyang naalala.

Ano na kaya ginagawa nya ngayon? Kumusta na kaya sya? Kumain na ba sya? o natutulog lang sya lage?

Haaaay! Ayoko rin naman na tawagan sya at baka aakalain nyang napaka easy to get ko.