The library

August 31st 2003

"Fuck you and your little fucking Johanna Alex, you complete piece of shit! I don't wanna hear any explanations!" My voice came out broken as tears threatened to spill from my eyes.

"It's not fooking like that Charlotte! I swear on my life it's nothing like what you think it is!" Alex almost pleaded to me as he took a couple paces towards me.

"What the fuck is it like then Alex? What's it like? "I'll meet you tomorrow baby" what the fuck does that mean?" I shot back and stepped back from him further.

"Uh...you guys... you guys alright?" Matt said quietly.

"It's nothing!" Alex snapped at Matt but the shakiness of his voice was audible. He turned to face me once more. "She's just a fooking friend Charlotte alright? Please just calm down! Please..." Alex got onto his knees and stared up at me.

"You don't even call ME baby, Alex. Suddenly I'm to believe you call some fucking 'friend' baby am I?" I glared down at him.

"I'm telling you the entire truth love and nothing but." Alex looked distraught and my breath hitched as I watched his eyes become glassy.

"Is um...is rehearsal called off" Matt mumbled.

"I can't believe you Alex. I'm not angry... I-I'm just disappointed." I shook my head and picked up my bag and slung it over my shoulder before briskly walking out of the garage as Alex quickly jogged after me, pleading and begging.

It all unfolded when I arrived at Alex's at midday. The boy had invited me along to another rehearsal in the lead up to their show at the Pheasant late next month.

We cuddled together on his bed for around an hour while we waited for the other Arctic Monkeys to arrive. We talked about anything and everything. We asked each other where we saw ourselves in the next ten years. I answered that I wanted to run my own fashion label and be a semi-respected artist while Alex mentioned that he would love to headline Glastonbury and put out at least one charting album.

It was perfect. Lying on my side in a feral position with Alex spooning me, his slender arm sneaking around my waist and pulling me into him.

Alex had already fallen asleep after an hour and I was beginning to as well when a buzz from the bedside table shook me awake - I'm a very light sleeper.

I carefully sat up, unravelling Alex's arm on my waist and swung my legs around to sit on the edge of the bed. I picked up Alex's phone as that was the source of the buzz. I heard the front door open and slam back shut again in the background. I read over the notification.

Johanna (1)
Hey x I'll meet you tomorrow baby xx

I frowned slightly and opened the message since Alex didn't, or didn't know how to, have a password on his phone. I read through the most recent messages.

Alex 24/8/03
She's coming back tonight baby.

Johanna 24/8/03
We'll have to meet up soon though right? x

Alex 24/08/03
Of course baby x

My hand slowly began to shake as I stood up. I took a shuddery breath before speaking, my voice coming out as little more than a whisper. "Alex?"

The boy in the bed stirred slightly by showed no signs of waking up so I repeated what I had said twice more before he opened his eyes to look at me, a small smile forming on his lips.

"Alex... can you wipe that smile off your face please?" I spoke softly, clutching his phone by my side.

His smile quickly dropped and he furrowed his eyebrows. "You're acting strange Lottie." His voice was raw.

"Who's Johanna, Alex?" I inquired and tilted my head to the side slightly, pursing my lips.

Alex sat up fully and frowned. "Who?"

"Alex don't act stupid. Who's Johanna?" I pressed.

"Charlotte I honestly don't know what you're talking about." Alex rubbed his eyes and stared at me.

"You don't know? Oh ok what's this then?" I held up the phone so that the screen was showing and started to tap my foot.

Alex's eyes darted from the screen of the phone to the bedside table and his jaw went slack. "I...she's just a friend Lotte."

"Oh so now your memory is clearing is it?" I spat harshly which made Alex jump slightly.

"Oh...Lottie-"

"Don't "Lottie" me! You've been cheating whilst I've been gone! You're a scumbag Alex."I glared at him and tossed his phone back onto the bedside table before storming out the bedroom.

"Charlotte! Wait!" Alex sprang out of bed and ran after me as I made for the garage which was where I left my bag, bursting into the cold room unaware that the rest of the Arctic Monkeys were already here and setting up.

"Charlotte I beg you just let me explain!"