Octopus Lips

Let Him Go

Despite everything that was going on I still managed to drag myself to dance class. Because if I was looking forward to seeing any person it was Micah Halabi. Smiling, upbeat Micah, with his usual sound advice and awkward, easy going way of going about. A great dancer, a mess of a human, and one of my favorite people. I had seen him a few times since I found out about his soulmate and well... I could use a good conversation with my man.

"Hey Gwen, how are you doing?" He asked as soon as I walked in the door.

I smiled at him sarcastically and then sighed and pulled my hair up in a quick bun. "I'm hanging in there."

He cast me a sympathetic looked at we started stretching and warming up. "Yeah?"

"I... I don't know what to do about my boyfriend." I admitted, the taste of the word was sour on my tongue.

He tilted his head. "Do you still want to be with him?"

"I... I don't know." I groaned.

"Well you've got plenty of time to think about it." He pointed out. "Is he... being mean to you? Or violent?"

I hesitated. "He... he cheated on me."

His eyebrows flew up in surprise. "Do I need to come over there and talk to him?"

I smiled thinly. "Nah, I think I'll be okay. I guess... I just wanted to ask you about your soulmate, since none of my friends have theirs yet. Have you ever fought with... him?"

Micah's eyes lit up with the kind of glow I had only seen from his heart before. "I mean, sometimes, but I genuinely love him and I know that he loves me and I wouldn't trade it for anything in the whole world, because he's my other half."

I sighed. "That's adorable but it doesn't really help me."

He laughed. "Well, this is going to come off as mean, but..."

"Go ahead."

"Sometimes people change. From what you've told me it sounds like Gordon isn't the same person you fell in love with."

His words hit me like a brick. "Huh."

He stopped stretching to put a hand on my shoulder. "It's gonna be alright Gwen. You don't even have to make this decision now, just think about it. I'm sure if you really wanted to you could work through this."

I nodded, and that sentence ran through my head for the rest of the day, like a firefly trapped in a jar. It buzzed around and bumped against the glass walls, yearning for freedom. I kept that firefly in my hands, not ready to let it go of it quite yet.

The ride home was slow and for the first time in years I found myself getting carsick. I was unnaturally tired too. My parents were home when I walked in the door, with my dad making dinner and my mom sitting at the bar and talking about work with him. My parents were soulmates. The thought was a bitter one nowadays.

"Hey hon," my mom beckoned me over. "How was your day? You look tired."

I smiled weakly and then sighed. "I'm having a very long week."

"Anything worth sharing?" My dad raised an eyebrow.

"Uh..." I hesitated, "actually maybe. I'm fighting with Gordon."

The calm and soft aura of the room born from their previous conversation died slowly, and I had their full attention, like the world's most conflicted ballerina.

"What happened?" My mom asked.

"I uh..." I looked down at my hands. "I found out he's been seeing other girls behind my back."

My dad raised an eyebrow in disparagement and my mom's mouth formed a small 'o', like a fish. They looked shocked in their own entirely different ways and I laughed dryly. At least it was getting easier every time I had to force those sandpapered words out of my throat.

"Why?" My mom looked almost ready to call him up. "You two have always been so close!"

I sighed. "From what I've gathered, he was unable to put full trust in me emotionally-"

"You've been together for two years, what was he doing during that time?" My dad scoffed.

"My thoughts exactly! Which is why I'm having such a hard time. I talked to Micah today and he thought Gordon might have changed since then and that might have something to do with it."

"That's possible... oh hon what are you gonna do?" My mother pressed her knuckles against her mouth.

"I... I don't know." I admitted.

"Soulmates," my dad started, "or at least the concept of these signs that lead us to our other half... you know they're more of a suggestion, right?"

I glanced up at him, with his peppery black hair and ridiculous pink apron he always insisted he had to wear when it was his night to cook. His eyes were dark but not cold and deeply understanding.

"What?"

"There's..." He paused, trying to find the right words, "if I had decided not to date your mother, eventually the string would have connected me to the next best person I would have matched up with."

"What?" I frowned, in disbelief. "How do you know this?"

"I had a friend in high school whose girlfriend passed away while we were still in school." He glanced down at his shoes. "He was sure he was never going to find love but I ran into him again a few months ago and he was married. The string came back, it was the strangest thing too, he described as 'appearing when he was finally ready to let her go'."

"Wow." I blinked, not entirely sure how to process this information. "Huh."

The gears were already turning in my brain. I walked out of the room and shoved some snacks and other items into a backpack. Then I rejoined my family in the kitchen and kissed them both on the cheek.

"I'll be back in a bit, don't wait for me." I told them.

They turned and shot me both confused and mildly annoyed looked, especially my dad who was making servings for three. "Where are you going?"

"Rosie's!" I yelled through the closing door.

I pulled out my phone and called her, throwing my skateboard onto the ground and jumping on it, cruising down the street at prime speed. It rang out once before she picked up.

"Gwen? What's up?" She asked.

"Meet me in the park in five minutes, it's important and I can't tell you till you get there." I told her.

"Okay, wh-"

I hung up before she could ask more questions.