broken maknae,, j.jk x bts

5

I knew who he was. He's my old best friend from when I younger. He moved next door to my house. He was born in America and lived there for 6 years. His name is Luke. 

He always had a thing for dying his hair. It looks good on him. Before he got up to leave I said,"Luke,"He looked back and smiled. Luke has the cutest tooth gap ever 

For the rest of the fan meet. I smiled even bigger. When it was time to leave I got the box that the necklace that said Golden Maknae on it, had a piece of paper that had a number. 

The guys yelled and said to get in the van. I hopped in the van and sat next to Jimin and Hoseok Hyung. Great. Luckily Hobi Hyung was next to me. He hasn't hurt me yet. I got my phone and headphones out and played music and added Luke as a contact. I texted him saying it was Jungkook.

He responded with, I missed you.

Me: This's Jungkook

Luke: I missed you Kookie

Me: missed you too Lukey. 

Luke: How are you

Me: I'm good

Luke: You're not cutting anymore are you

Me: Nope I've been clean since I joined the group. 

Luke: That good, Are your Hyung good to you

Me: They're awesome 

Me: I have to go bye

Luke: Okay Bye kookie

(Is it only me that if I don't want to text about something I say I have to go, No, Okay back to the story)

I looked out the window listening to my music. I felt something war slide down my check. I pulled my sweatshirt hood up and continued to look out the window. The sky was cloudy and soft splashes of rain fell agent the window. The rain got heavier and heavier until it was pouring rain. 

My tears kept coming and they wouldn't stop. When we got to the dorm I ran inside my room not caring about what Jimin Hyung said yesterday. I hopped in the shower, took my blade and ran it across my arm. The red of the blood mixed with the warm water. I cleaned my arm and then cleaned my body. 

I feel disgusting in my own skin. I'm fat, I can't dance, can't sing, can't do anything right. I look at the scars on my arms and see someone pathetic. I look at my face and see an ugly boy looking back. Why am I like this?

I walked out of my bathroom and put an oversized sweater on with some sweatpants. I looked in my desk drawers for my sketch pad. I found my pencils and started to draw my feelings out on one sheet of paper. 

I draw a park or the park by my family's house, one side is all sunny and the other is cloudy, rainy, and sad. 

I flipped through the book and saw many pictures of my Hyungs. Jin Hyung in the kitchen, Suga Hyung in his studio, Hoseok Hyung in the dance room, Namjoon Hyung in his studio, Jimin Hyung playing with a puppy, and Taehyung-Hyung in his room playing a video game. I never drew myself. I've drawn us as a group without me, I've drawn Got7, G-Dragon when I was younger, and Luke. I draw landscape, fictional places, and when I was in the darkest part of depression last time I drew the voices in my head. 

I color the picture I finished and walked out of my room. I got a glass of water and walked back to my room. In the living room Jin Hyung, Namjoon Hyung, Taehyung-Hyung, and Hoseok Hyung were sitting laughing at a movie. 

I opened my door and saw Jimin Hyung sitting on my bed. He looked up and smirked. Oh Gosh."H-hi Jimin Hyung, Wh-What are y-you doing here,"I asked.

"I thought I told you to not run into your room without listening to what your Hyungs are saying to you,"He got up off my bed and slowly walked up to me. I back up until I was in the corner of my bedroom. He just smirked. He punched me in the stomach and kicked me once I fell over. 

He hit me a few more time and started to tell me things like,"You to fat to be in this group," and"I don't see how you're even here, your a fat, untalented, selfish bitch," and walked out of my room. 

Memories of when my dad used to abuse me both physically and mentally. More tears fell out of my eyes and I cried for a while. I crawled to my bed and curled into a ball. I cried myself to sleep.

I woke up in a cold sweat. I got out of bed and went into the shower. I ended up cutting my thighs and a few on my wrists. I got out of the shower and put on a black button up shirt with black ripped jeans. I got my phone from off the charger and walk into the living room. I see Jin Hyung moving around the kitchen and walked over to him.

"Jin Hyung,"I said in a small voice.

"Yes Jungkook," He said not looking at me.

"I'm going to go to the Got7 household for a few hours before practice in the afternoon,"I said.

"Okay, bye," Jin Hyung's voice wasn't like normal it was hard and cold. 

I walked to the Got7 dorms and walked right in. Jinyoung was in the living room drinking tea when I got there."Hyung can I stay here until I go to practice later,"Giving him big eyes.

"Sure Kookie," He said. He patted the couch next to him so I sat next to him. BamBam showed up and we cuddled for a while. Mark Hyung came out of his room and cuddled with us. The clock said it was almost 11: 30 so I asked Mark to drop me off at Practice which he was happy with doing. 

We got there and he left to go home. I ran to the practice room and noticed I was here before the boys. I sat on the floor and stretched. My stomach hurts from Jimin Hyung hitting me yesterday. 

We practiced till almost 10:00 tonight. We got home and I said goodnight to everyone and went to sleep. 

A/N

I have to go to school tomorrow morning and I'm not ready for it