Second love | jirosé

[Chapter 12] "Why do I care?"

The tears keep falling and soon I start sobbing. They don't seem to stop. Things much sadder flash through my mind and I sob harder. If he had not left me like he had this all wouldn't be happening.
I regret not letting him stay that night. I remember his pleas for spending the night together but I had jokingly denied it.
If, if only I had accepted it, he wouldn't have met with that accident. The accident that changed my life.
I had planned our future together.
Every little detail.
Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that I would end up with his brother, who was cheating on me. Who has no feelings for me. Maybe I deserved this, maybe.

I curl into a ball on my bed, hugging my knees closer. The memories I made with him were unforgettable and as I remind myself of each one, I sob louder. Our first kiss was something I had longed for. It wasn't an accident neither had it happened when I wasn't expecting it not to. It was perfect.
I remember how I had blushed just because of the brush of his hands against mine. There was those times and now, where I don't get to meet him anymore and the sad truth which I am aware of, I won't ever meet him again.

My thoughts are interrupted by the sudden opening of the door. Jimin walks in with heavy steps and then he comes to a halt once he sees me.

"Were you crying? Is something wrong?" He asks, concerned as he walks closer to me.

I shut my eyes and don't reply. I don't have the strength to neither do I  want to.  I can sense him walk closer and then the mattress beside me sinks as he sits beside me.

"What's wrong? Chaeyoung, speak,"he commands with a soft tone to his voice.

I don't answer.  I simply shuffle out of bed, pulling out my phone and showing him the article.

His expression changes to one of confusion.

"I can expla—"

"How will you? Just accept it Jimin. You could have told this to me earlier, I would not have accepted this marriage. Why did you do this? Explain? Are you going to say that you started dating her yesterday? What excuse have you made up?" I snarl. I vent out all the anger that was built up inside me.

"Excuse? I don't have to make an excuse. It's not like we are actually a couple in love. We both knew what we were getting into. Stop accusing me. It's not like I am committed to you. Why would you care anyways?" He retorts.

Then it hits me. He never loved me. Why would he?
He is right. Why would I care? But I do and the reason is something I haven't come to a conclusion with.
I don't find the need to enquire any further. He has already explained everything.
But the question he asked left me thinking. I stay silent and he walks away. I don't stop him. I don't want to carry this conversation any further.

"Why do I care?"I question myself, mumbling the words.

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A/N: it has not even been a week since school started and I already have work pilling up.