Painful

Goodbye

When I arrived home I told Mia I needed some time alone. She left and now I was all alone. I opened the front door, threw my keys on the dresser and found my way to the couch. Joey sat down next to me and looked at me. I started crying out loud. How could I believe everything people told me? They said he would like me too. And although he admitted, I couldn't believe that. The worst part was that my best friend was the one who caused all this pain. How could she do this to me

I shouldn't had cried in front of him. How stupid could I be?

As the last tear fell down my cheek, I fell asleep.

---

When I woke up the next morning I had a little headache, probably from all the crying.

I stood up from the couch and went upstairs to take a shower and brush my teeth. When I was done I changed in my comfortable clothes and just decided to pack my stuff. Although I had one day left, I didn't have a reason to stay. My bag was pretty full but that didn't matter. I was going to be gone for a long time, so I needed every single thing that could possibly make me happy.

I called the number that was written on the paper. A man answered. I informed him and ended with "Thank you". I hung up and started packing.

I had packed the photos of everyone I promised to, even Alex. I looked at Nate's picture and a smile appeared on my face. I hadn't forgotten about yesterday, but I was going to miss his presence the most.

I trew my bags in the car and went inside the house again. I made my way through the house to look if I had missed something. After I was done I looked in the garden one more time. I sighed deeply and turned to Joey. What was I going to miss him. I gave him a kiss on his fluffy head and brought him and his stuff with me to the car, as I shut the door for the last time. I started the motor and looked in my rear-view mirror to my house.

I hadn't ate yet so I decided to go to Rosie's bakery. It gave me the opportunity to tell her goodbye too. I turned the music on and kept looking to Joey. When we arrived I parked the car and grabbed Joey. We walked inside and saw Rosie.

"Hey Rosie!" She looked up and hurried to me. "Emma! How are you feeling? Are you alright, darling?!" She asked worriedly. I smiled friendly. "I'm okay. I need to talk to you though" I said with a sigh. "Sure, darling. What's on your mind?" We both sat down across from each other and she hold my hand. "First of all I want to thank you," I started. "You're like my grams.." "this sounds as a goodbye. We have a day left" she noticed concerned. I swallowed "It is. Im leaving tonight". Her eyes were now filled with tears. I walked over to her and gave her a big hug. "Don't cry. It's going to be alright" I assured her. She didn't say anything at first, but after a moment she looked up at me. "I know it will, but you need to promise me one thing," I furrowed my brow. What did she want? "The next time you'll be here again, you won't return to the army" I looked in her eyes, normally you would see some kind of emotion, but now I couldn't even see a sparkle. She was deadly serious. I thought about it for a moment. "I promise" I decided.

After I had ate I went to the police station. I could feel the gazes of the people that were on the party last night, but I ignored it.

I walked out of the elevator immediately to Jason's office. I knocked on the door and walked inside. Jason was sitting on the couch with grams. "Emma!" She gasped. Jason turned around to face me. "Hey grams, hey Jason" I smiled nervously. "What are you doing here? What happened yesterday?" Jason asked. "I had a surprise party yesterday, with lots of surprises" I answered sarcastically as I sat down across them. "Emma, I'm serious" "Jason please.." I begged him to let it be. "I'm here for a reason" I informed. They both looked questioning at me. I sighed deeply and looked at the floor to avoid their eyes. "I'm here to say goodbye. I'm leaving today" it was silent for a moment till I heard a sob. I looked up and saw grams crying. Jason looked at me with disbelief and pity. I walked over them to give them a big hug and after a while I felt some extra arms around me. I looked up to see Mia and Luke. I smiled, trying so hard not to cry. "I love all of you" I said as I tightened the hug. Both Mia and grams were crying and even Luke and Jason shed a tear. "Please don't cry" I begged them. We sniffed and I smiled gently noticing the time on the clock. "I have to go, it's getting late and I still have to bring Joey to Nate.

As I walked out of the office I looked back one more time. My breathing got heavier and I couldn't control it. When I got out of the building I hurried to a corner where no one would notice me easily. My hands found its way to my mouth and the tears, that were covering my view, escaped my eyes. I let everything out, closing my eyes. This feeling was so bad. It really hurts to say goodbye knowing it could be the last one. I tried not to cry in front of the rest, because I didn't want them to get scared, if that makes any sense.

My warm, salty tears kept falling down. Till someone wiped them away. I was shocked and quickly opened my eyes to see Nate. "Don't cry" his voice came out. He looked tired and something was off, he looked at me emotionless. I stared at him for a moment before I threw my arms around his waist. I started sobbing quietly this time. He froze for a moment, but he wrapped his arms around my little figure and started to rub my head.

As I had my head against his chest I could hear his heartbeat. It was beating just a little faster than it normally would. I sniffed and pulled myself back. I looked at the ground to avoid his eyes, not wanting him to see my (probably) red and swollen ones. Before I could say something he started asking "why are you leaving?" My head snapped at him, but I quickly looked at the ground again when his eyes met mine. "How do you know?" I asked almost whispering. "Luke called me" he answered. I smiled slightly "why are you the only one that sees me cry?" I asked looking him in the eye. He looked away emotionless, but I knew he felt guilty just by his body language.

I sniffed and wiped away my tears, trying to pull myself together. "I'm sorry," he murmured. "I know it's my fault. I want you to know I didn't kiss her yesterday, that doesn't mean I'm innocent, but what I told you yesterday was true... I love you". My heartbeat rose, but I was awfully calm.

I was relieved. He was probably telling the truth, because he knew it would probably be the last time we would see each other. So I couldn't stand it anymore.... I kissed him.

He deepend it and I could feel a salty tear mix between our lips. I slightly pulled away and looked into his eyes. This time it wasn't emotionless. His eyes sparkled and I could see he didn't know how to react, but so did I. I turned around to walk towards my car, but he stopped me by throwing his arms around my waist and burying his head in my neck. My eyes widened in shock and I froze. "N-Nate?" He didn't answer.

I putted my hands on top of his. "You're breaking my heart" my voice cracked. I inhaled sharply "You're  breaking mine too. Please don't make this worse" he answered. His grip loosened and I walked towards my car with his hand in mine.

"Someone's waiting for you" I said he looked questioning to me and I smiled pitiful at him. He followed me and I opened the car. Joey immediately started to bark. Nate chuckled adorable, but a line off tears appeared in his eyes. I hand him over Joey and gave him his bag with stuff.

"Remember, you'll be the only one I would never forget" I said. He smiled sadly and a tear escaped his eye. I kissed it away and got in my car, multiple tears finding its way down. I looked up one more time and drove off.

I guess that was a goodbye.