Part 3: Teri Jhuki Nazar

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Tandon Farmhouse
5.00 pm
It was after 5.00pm when they finally reached the Tandon farmhouse.

Farmhouse isn't really the word for it, thought Ishita as she looked at the substantial mansion set in manicured lawns, surrounded by groves of trees. This is beautiful. If only we could have come here with Ruhi and all the family, when we were still happy...

She glanced up at Raman, who had opened the car door for her and was extending a hand to help her out.

Three hours of sitting stiffly, trying not to betray her emotions, trying not to glance at him, had taken its toll on her and left her exhausted. Furious at him for putting her in this situation, for bringing her here, to show her what could have been, she ignored his outstretched hand and climbed slowly out of the car.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him stiffen, then his hand dropped, as he walked away.

He looks so tired too she thought with a pang, as she watched him walk up to the door of the house, held open by a uniformed butler. He has been pushing himself so hard at work this past month, just to avoid the unhappiness in our home. But then she remembered that the unhappiness had been caused by him, that he alone had been responsible for her pain, for their pain, and she hardened her heart, following him into the house.

She entered the door just behind him, walking into a beautifully decorated entrance lobby, with an open plan living room down three shallow stairs to the left, and an ornately carved staircase to the right.

The butler bowed to her, gesturing to the living room, before turning to walk up the staircase with the bags he must have removed from the car. He had barely made it up one stair, when Raman called out, his voice exhausted.

"Thehro" His voice was weary, but resigned. "Bags ko wapas car mein rakh . Zaroorat nahi padegi ".
(Wait. Put the bags back in the car. We won't be needing them)

"Thik hai, bhaiya " Ishita interjected as the butler hesitated." Aap upar lekar jao".
(It's okay. You can take them upstairs)

The butler looked from one to the other uncertainly, and then at Raman's nod, proceeded to climb the stairs, disappearing with the bags.

Raman looked questioningly at Ishita, and she turned her gaze towards him, keeping her voice neutral, emotionless.

" You look exhausted Raman. Why don't you go and shower and freshen up. We can always reload the bags later, once you have said what you want to".

The hope that had flickered on Raman's face died away, and he nodded briefly, before following the butler up the staircase.

Ishita looked after him, conflicting emotions clashing in her heart. She had been so hurt by what he had done, by his support of Shagun, his lies and his deceit towards her, her family, yet she could not hate him.

She did not know what it was about the way he looked at her that tugged at her heart strings, that gave rise to a sweet ache inside, that made her that made her want to caress away the pain and anguish she saw in his face... Surely this could not be love.

Chahe kuch na kehna
Bhale chup tu rehna
Mujhe hai pata, Tere pyar ka
Khamosh chehra, Ankhon pe pehra
Khud hai gawaah, tere pyar ka

Love was the happy feeling she had had with Subbu, not this bewildering mixture of pain and ecstasy that she experienced with Raman. Yes, they had been developing a special friendship, they had become confidantes, partners, she had thought they were friends. But he had rendered all her beliefs, all her assumptions asunder, by lying to her, by constructing such a complex web of lies with Shagun.

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