Rogue One: Jyn & Cassian One-Shots

(14) Survivors Pt. 2

Goner ~ Twenty One Pilots  

Best Friend ~ Rex Orange County

idon'twannabeyouanymore ~ Billie Eilish 

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Jyn looked out of the small window in the kitchen of her farmhouse. Cassian was outside checking on the crops about to be harvested. She thought back to the time when she and Cassian stood hand in hand in front of Mon Mothma. They hid their nervousness through the smiles they gave one another. 

Upon asking Mon Mothma's aid in finding a community to hide in, they continued to perform their duties inside of the base. Jyn's favorite time of the day was falling asleep with Cassian beside her. Their kisses grew deeper and more passionate. Their shared fill of nightmares was followed by kisses and embraces. 

Now she stood under a single roof she could call her own. Their closest neighbors were loyal and no one questioned their place. Their lives were tranquil. Cassian kept reminding her they deserved that much, but Jyn followed the news of the rebellion and wished she could help. 

"You've already given your life to the rebellion. We deserve this, Jyn," he said to her. "It's time for new heroes to take the stage. That Luke Skywalker seems promising."

Despite having to change their identities to the public, Cassian was always there to remind her of who she was. When ships would pass overhead, he was there to hold her hand while tightening his jaw and hoping the people on that ship weren't looking for them. They struggled together and they celebrated together. Jyn had never known what it was like to celebrate her birthday until Cassian walked through the door with a new pair of boots for her. With research, she found the same recipes her parents would follow to make her favorite childhood meals. 

The silence was uneasy to her at first. There was no muffled sounds of the overhead speaker. Alarms were nonexistent. She rose with the sun and made sure blue milk was always in store. Cassian quickly learned the skills to farm, but she never failed in assisting him. She learned to enjoy the feeling of the dirt in her fingers and was reminded of the days she and her father would work out in the fields. 

She would be helping Cassian at the moment if it weren't for the baby she now held in her arms after peacefully living in hiding for 3 years. The silence was now filled with the child's laughter or crying. Jyn's fears of being found were heightened when she thought about bringing this child into the world. 

She was named Lyra after her own mother. There were random moments when she imagined the spirits of those she had lost surround her and her family. It gave her a sort of comfort when the paranoia returned. Cassian had felt the same way. 

He had begun doing daily target practice after finding out Jyn was pregnant. She had joined him until they had gotten into a fight after Jyn found a blaster under Cassian's pillow. It made her feel as though she were in another war zone, always in survival mode. Cassian's paranoia only worsened hers. 

"I-I shouldn't have done it, Jyn, I'm sorry. There's really no use for it anymore and you know that," he said to her. 

"Then why did we start target practice again? Is it too soon for this, Cassian? It's been years and nothing yet we're still scared of being found out. Maybe we never should've left the base," Jyn said with a sigh. 

Cassian placed his hand on her growing stomach, "We'll never stop thinking like soldiers even when we've stopped being them. We'll get through this."

He placed his forehead on hers and felt her stomach rise and fall. 

"We lived so let's make the most of it," he said to her. She nodded in approval, placing her hand on top of his. It got easier until Lyra's cries broke the silence they had grown so accustomed to. 

Cassian was always the first to enter panic mode, "Why won't she stop?"

"It's natural even when it goes on for this long. She just needs to know she's safe," Jyn reassured him, guiding his arms into a swaying motion. He took deep breathes in and out while continuing to rock his daughter back and forth. 

Lyra's eyes closed to Cassian's relief. "Of all the missions I've ever done..." he began. "This one is by far the most challenging."

Jyn leaned into his shoulder, "This isn't a mission though is it? It's just... life."

Cassian smiled and looked outside to the star-filled sky of infinite possibilities that he was glad to never return to.