#12.3 Immune (Louis Tomlinson Fan Fic)
To me, her words and action didn't seem in coherence for her eyes and body language, only vaguely, gave out her thoughts. It looked as if she was only pushing me away to see if I was strong enough to crumble her walls and crawl right back in.
Which I was.
I pulled at her forearms and covered her mouth with mine. My movements couldn't really be described as vanilla but they weren't rough either. My need was clearly on display and she didn't seem to hold anything in, on the other hand.
Her fingers were in my hair, clawing and scratching to satiate in the minimal touch that she and I could share before I pushed her body back onto the cold marble surface, where we both had just shared a moment, but she pulled back from the kiss.
"This is not going to change my decision." Her eyes were turning opaque and my heart was racing thinking that every second that I was spending being mute I was losing her. But the funny part was, she wasn't mine to claim at all.
"I love you." I tried the only card I had left, the 'L-word.'
"You don't Louis."
"I know what I feel."
"Louis." She stepped closer to me and I was losing my mind. "You don't love me, okay? Don't let your penis control your brain. Just because I make you hard doesn't mean you're whipped. Stop."
What was more to say?
She stormed out of the bathroom, naked, as I was left there standing and thinking this over. I had to do something. I had to stop her. If only I knew how.
But I end up running after her.
"Fuck. Just one more. Then I won't stop you." And I didn't even realise how weak she had made me until my own pleading caught in my ears.
Why did she have that effect on me?
She raised an eyebrow at me, halting her pace unable to believe I was really begging to have sex with her.
"One more and I'll leave." She agreed.
Without giving her time to reconsider her decision, I kissed her. It was rough with desire and anger that I held against her, for no particular reason. One of my hand grabbed at her waist while the other pulled on her hair so she could tilt her head back and give me access to more of her skin. She seemed tired and raw after the session we just had but I wasn't any close to compensating.
"Louis." She moaned pushing me back for the second time and taking my starting-to-get-hard length in her hands. She just wanted to get over with all of this. I could sense it. It was almost as if she was afraid that if she let herself loose and feel any of it, she might change her decision. And I had quite an intention to use all of this against her.
I was determined to make her see even though a part of me was delusional about it.
She pumped me few times until I had her on the floor with her legs open and welcoming. I hovered over her and as soon as I dipped my body over hers and entered her, she closed her eyes-something she never previously practised. Her face contorted with pain or pleasure, I had no clear idea.
She raised her hips off the floor a little and wrapped her tired legs over my lower half and simultaneously slipped her right hand into my left. Her face muscles relaxed and I took that as my cue to move. Her insides were warm and tight, accommodating me in the best way that they could. I quickened my pace losing interest in what I had planned because I was no where close to getting any sort of reaction out of her. Her face was straight and she only looked like she was concentrating on her release, nothing else as her hips gyrated with mine to milk me in the best way possible.
And it followed. Her muscles down below clenched over my hardened member as I helped her ride her high and mine came shortly after. I end up shooting out strings of warm goey strings that deposited themselves in her and I crashed down on her, revelling in my release. She mirrored me with heavy wheezes and puffs of air that originated deep in her throat as she lay still.
Our breathing wasn't even too erratic, only deep pants emanated. My gaze was fixed on her while her brows iris' were still hidden under her eyelids. A few seconds later, she opened up to reflect such profound voidness that it managed to scream at me how bad I had lost yet it was all silent around us. A light humming pressed down in my ear and I could feel the thump of my heartbeat all over.
But everything was over as I realised, I lost my chance.
I rolled over so I was no longer hindering her departure from this house but she lay in her place, completely silent and still.
"You're free. I won't stop you." My throat was starting to incinerate by itself and my insides felt like they were being carved. It pained yet a new found fury fuelled in me.
Why was it only me chasing an emotion we both clearly felt? I knew she lied about it all being meaningless fuck and she was being irrational. She and I were clearly more than that.
Hearing my snicker, she sat up straight facing away. Her moves appeared calculated to my eye but not once did I budge and stop her from leaving. I only sat by, watching her existence fade away from the four walls she and I shared.
For I no longer had the heart to ask her to stop and hold. I was done chasing. It however still would be the world's greatest lie if I said I had stopped feeling for her. I did love her but I had now turned immune to the pain the love brought with itself. I was immune to her beauty and what she had in her to influence me with.
I was immune to her.
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