Waiting For You

Chapter 12: Trying Again

Chapter 12: Trying Again

Amelia

July rolls into August without warning, bringing along even more sweltering heat.

I've been so busy helping my sister with her wedding these last few weeks that I barely even notice the time pass, which I suppose is a good thing.

Abby and Tyler have decided that they're getting married on the third Saturday of September, two weeks after the start of the new semester. We've got our dresses and the boys have their suits, the photographer is booked, invites have been sent out and RSVPs have even started trickling in. My mom has been such a big help so far, working on ordering the cake and getting in contact with one of her friends that does catering. Every single day that passes, a few things get crossed off the checklist. It looks like we might actually be able to do this.

I'll be completely honest though, I'm almost glad I haven't been battling morning sickness and fatigue on top of everything else. That would have definitely made the stress and anxiety even worse.

Before I know it, it's the middle of the month and I have to start worrying about prepping for my first day back at school. Fortunately I still have a couple weeks, because that's the least of my worries at the moment.

Today is embryo transfer day, take two.

The last time I was sitting in this chair, it was to find out that our first IVF cycle was unsuccessful. It's been over a month since our last visit, but I still feel very anxious. I'm afraid of going through this whole process another time, only to end up with the same results.

"Amelia Willems?" a nurse in teal scrubs calls and both Sam and I look up from our phones. "Dr. Cho will see you now."

We stand up and follow her through the big double doors and down the familiar carpeted hallway. She passes a few closed doors and gestures to the third one on the right that's already ajar.

"Right through here," she says, pushing it open and moving out of the way to allow us into the exam room. "You can change into these."

"Thank you," I say, taking the hospital gown from her.

"Thanks," Sam grins.

She tells us it won't be long now before Dr. Cho comes in to see us. Once she closes the door I change quickly and Sam ties me up at the back. I then hop into the exam chair, stretch out my legs and wring my hands together in my lap.

"I'm so nervous, a lot more than last time," I whisper.

"It's gonna be fine, we'll have twice the chances this time," Sam replies in the kind of clinical tone he might use to talk to the owner of one of his patients at the vet clinic. I know what that means. He's nervous too, but he's trying to put on a brave face.

He wants to make me feel better.

"I know we do, but I'm still nervous," I smile wryly.

There's been a lot of back and forth regarding our baby-making plans, from the timing to the number of embryos we want to implant this time around. Two means more chances of at least one of them taking, but it also means the possibility of us having twins.

The idea of having two babies growing inside of me is terrifying, but we've decided that if it does happen we'll be just fine. It'll just be twice the love to give, right?

We also considered only going back in October once everything settles down for me at work and I get used to my new schedule following a whole summer off. It's probably not the best plan of action, going back to work right when I should be finding out whether or not I'm pregnant, but I practically begged Sam not to let us wait that long.