His Second Choice (JiKook)

8

I felt the heat escape my body, like and it was like my veins contained ice instead of blood. My heart started pounding inside my chest and my knees began to tremble. I must have heard him wrong, maybe he'd said something totally unrelated. I gulped as I willed myself to ask him to repeat himself.

"Come again?"

In a voice softer than I could ever imagined coming from him, Jung Kook spoke the words I just realized I never wanted to hear.

"We're going to meet someone who might know where Tae Min is" he looked at me to gauge my reaction and I had no idea what expression my face carried at the moment. Was I happy, relieved, scared or angry? Did I want to see the man who had ruined so many lives and however unintentionally had destroyed mine the most? Why was Jung Kook doing this? He had lost so much as I had but did he still love him? My heart ached at how selfish I was being. How could I think about myself when this man in front of me deserved to get all the answers that he wanted? My brother had broken his heart, he'd broken and crushed his soul and had robbed him of the desire to love, and the least he deserved was to hear from his own mouth why he did that to him.

"How...how do you know this?" I asked quietly as stood in front of the door.

"This man called me a few days ago; he said he had some information for me and that if I didn't come see him he'd go to the press with it" he said all of this like it wasn't a big deal, like things like these happened on a regular basis. His voice had become cold again, detached and I didn't like it one bit.

Jung Kook rang the bell before I could say or ask anything. Almost immediately my hand reached for his, a way of my body telling me that I wasn't ready for this. He gazed at my hand, tightly clasping him and he must've understood my state of my since he didn't let go. Our breaths came out in puffs of smoke as we stood there, waiting for someone to let us in. I was trembling from head to toe, my flimsy jacket no match for the freezing cold of Seoul. Jung Kook pulled of his jacket and wrapped it around my shoulders. I looked at him gratefully but couldn't hold his gaze for long. The strong emotion in them was starting to scare me.

We got buzzed in and entered the building hand in hand. The walls were yellowing with paint peeling off all over. Water seeped onto the floor from the cracks and there was a rancid smell about the place. A metal stairway led to the upper floor and it creaked beneath out feet as Jung Kook led me to it. Honestly, I never wanted the staircase to end, if it ended I'd have to face the truth and that I didn't want to have to do. I was eighteen years old but I'd gone through more than any normal eighteen years old could ever imagine going through and it seemed like the problems never ended. I'd gotten used to my life but it was like someone was constantly reminding me that I'd never find peace in the life I'd been forced to choose.

We walked down a dingy corridor with a stained carpet lining the floor. The occasional drunkard stumbled out from the rooms and I found myself pressed firmly against Jung Kook's side. His protectiveness had obviously heightened since the incident at the airport and for the first time, I was glad I had someone to save me. I never allowed Tae Hyung to fight my battles for me, I didn't need someone to be my hero but I was grateful for Jung Kook's presence.

We came to a halt outside a room labeled 505. Loud music vibrated through the door and reverberated in my chest. By now a knot of tension had formed in my stomach and was constantly making my fists clench in pain. What if Tae Min-hyung was inside?

Jung Kook knocked firmly on the door and we waited with baited breath. I dared not look at him and he was avoiding looking directly at me. I knew my nails were digging into his palms but I couldn't let go of his hand. It just wasn't possible for me in the moment.

The door opened slightly and a foot popped itself between the small creak that opened up. The foot led to a leg covered in ripped jeans. I followed the trail to find a somewhat familiar face grinning at us.