To The Only Boy I've Loved Before

Just Pretending

"Hey, thanks for coming with me tonight," Joey said as they sat in a diner.

"Yeah, well I just hope Melissa doesn't kill me," Lauren said with a slight edge in her voice.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Are you kidding me?" she laughed. "She is seriously after you and I'm in the way of that. Had you really not noticed?"

Joey shrugged. "Does that make you jealous?"

"What?" she said incredulously. "No, of course not. I don't get jealous. And besides, we're not actually dating anyway."

He nodded at her and they fell into silence.

"She shouldn't take it out on you," he said after a moment, and Lauren could hear the anger in his voice.

"It's fine," she said, laying a hand on his arm.

"I love that you're not afraid of her though," he said.

"No, no, I'm terrified of her," Lauren told him.

"But you don't let her walk all over you," he insisted. "Like when she was being a complete bitch about your shoes."

"You remember that?" Lauren asked in surprise.

"Of course I do. I'm just sorry I didn't say anything."

"No, it's okay."

"If it helps, I thought the boots looked hot," he offered.

"Thank you?" she said, pursing her lips, not knowing how to respond to that.

"She just makes me so angry sometimes," Joey burst out.

"We're still talking about her?"

"Like tonight, she was trying to talk to me at the party when I told her I was with you, and now I have like a thousand texts from her."

"Okay, well have you responded to any of them?"

"No, no. I figured I'll just call her when I get home," Joey said, trying to dismiss the conversation.

Lauren raised her eyebrows. "You guys talk on the phone?"

"Well, not as much as we used to. But yeah, sometimes. I mean, Mel and I did used to be good friends, Lauren."

She tried to keep her face steady. She was very well aware of that fact, as much as she tried to forget it.

"Okay, what?" Joey asked her, exasperatedly.

"Hm?" Lauren said.

"You forget that we're good friends too. I can see by your face there's something up."

"Well, I just think it's weird that you guys still talk on the phone even when you're trying to get her to back off. It's not healthy."

"I could stop talking to her if I wanted to," Joey said defensively.

"No you couldn't. You're obsessed with her," she said.

"Okay, I am not obsessed with her," he protested.

"Sure," she said, making it very clear that she didn't believe him. "So then prove it. Don't call her tonight."

"For someone who doesn't get jealous you sure have a lot of opinions about my relationship with her."

"Well I just think that no one's ever been honest with you before. And it's about time someone was."

"Okay, fine. Be honest with me then. Why haven't you ever had a boyfriend?"

Lauren swallowed fearfully. "I don't know," she shrugged. "I guess no one's ever liked me like that."

Joey pointed a finger at her. "Lies."

She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Lies!" he continued. "I know that that is a lie because I know, for a fact, that Nick asked you to spring formal last year and you said no," he said smugly.

"Are you keeping tabs on me?" she asked with a smirk.

"C'mon Lopez, you gotta talk to me. No secrets."

Lauren considered that. "Okay, um," she tucked her hair behind her ear nervously. "So, love and dating, I love to read about it, and it's fun to think about in my head. But-" she paused. "When it's real-"

"What, it's scary?" Joey filled in for her with a gentle smile.

She gave him a tense smile back and nodded. "Yeah," she said softly.

"Why? Why is that scary" he asked in disbelief.

"Because the more people you let into your life, the more that can walk right out."

He gave her a pained look, but nodded understandingly.

"I think it's funny," he spoke. "You say that you're scared of commitment, and relationships, but you don't seem to be afraid to be with me."

"Well there's, there's no reason to be," she stuttered.

"And why's that?" He leant closer to her across the table.

"Because we're just pretending."

He gave her a slightly stunned look and drew back.

"Of course. Lauren Lopez, ladies and gentleman, you can count on her to be honest. Always."

He gave her a bitter smile and she frowned at him as he got up to pay.

The car ride home was uncomfortably silent. He pulled up to her house and she had her hand on the door handle when she said "Wait, Joey?"

"Mm."

"Are we cool?"

"Yeah," he said too quickly, his voice slightly higher than usual. "We're fine Lopez. Thank you, for coming to the party tonight."

She smiled at him. "You're welcome. Goodnight."

He nodded, and she walked into her house without looking back at him.

As soon as she shut the door behind her, her phone pinged with a notification. She opened it to find one of the pictures he took that night, where she's kissing his cheek, captioned 'me and bae'.

She bit her lip to hide a smile even though there was no one there to see it.

'bae? You are such a dork!' she texted him.

He sent back the kissing face emoji, and Lauren couldn't help the soft smile that spread over her face.

"Who are you texting?" Lauren looked up to find Julia watching her from the living room doorway with a smirk.

"No one."

"Is it Joey?"

"How did you-"

"Jaime told me you'd gone to a party with him tonight. I'm glad you're happy, Lauren."

"You are?"

"Of course I am. You'd seemed so lonely recently so it's nice to see you have fun."

Lauren smiled at her and made to go to her room, but Julia's voice stopped her.

"So are you two dating then?"

Shit. Lauren turned around slowly to face her best friend.

"Yes," she said, trying to stop her face burning at the lie. Well, it wasn't exactly a lie. But it definitely wasn't the truth.

Julia grinned. "That's great."

Lauren hurried away to her room and buried her face in her pillow, hating herself for not confiding in Julia. But it would break her heart if Lauren let her in on the fact that this wasn't real. Why not let her believe it for a while?