BLACK BEAUTY

Fake is the new original

Sheraton hotel Lagos..

Ewa had developed a heightened sensitivity to the frustrating and disdainful use of faux British accent right from the time she began to walk..

Her uncle,uncle jide popularly called "jelili" by the children in the house had made that possible..she remembered him to be a stout man with stubble that were as sharp as Gillette razor blade,he always reeked of alcohol and cigarette...
The children loved him but the adult were often repelled by his eccentric behaviour and they warned their children to stay away from him but it always fell on deaf ears.

It was so until one day when he came to the house to see baba, to tell him that he'll be traveling out of the country.. and so uncle jide travelled only to come back after 2 months with a faux British accent,winter jackets,snow boot, beanies and many others.

He brought so many candies and shared it amongst the children,Ewa ate lots of it until her mouth became sore and stopped after she made several trips to the toilet to deposit watery faeces.

Uncle jide 's accent amazed everyone including the adults until after some months when his money got exhausted and he refused to go back.

It was then everyone took notice of the annoying way he pronounced each of his words,omitting letters in words like "Wa-ha (water) or the use of "innit" in virtually Everything he said.

Uncle jide died when Ewa was 16 of a failed kidney,no one succeeded him,no wife and no kids.

******
Arriving at the dinner Ewa stuck close to Mr Kelvin, she felt intimidated by the crowd of affluent people all gathered under one roof and she was just at the bottom of the food chain.

Back at Marie's, after much persuasion and begging Ewa had settled for no makeup on her face,although her 4c hair was tied up to a tuff on her head,and the beautiful white strapless gown that hugged her in all the right place felt a bit too tight..
She mentally noted not to eat too much.

Ewa held a jotter in her clutch in case the need arises for it although Mr Kelvin had told her the dinner party was hosted to socialize with the bourgeoisie's of the society.

"Let's go over there,do not do anything just stand there and be beautiful"? Mr Kelvin said.

Ewa wondered if he meant it literally or There was more to it.

She managed to stay in the same pace with him surprisingly judging from the 50 inches heels Marie made her wear.

"Oh chief Bankole"! Mr Kelvin beamed.

A fat pot bellied man wearing an agbada turned around to facing them throwing up the drooping fabric over his shoulder in the process.

"Ahn ahn, Akilapa junior! Is this you I'm seeing for free"!

Mr Kelvin went down on all fours as he prostrated to greet him.

"You are all grown up now,the last time I saw you was at your dad's funeral...may his soul rest in peace". He added.

"Amen" Mr Kelvin replied.

"How's the company going,i trust you are handling things well"?

"Ofcourse sir,we're trying, the publicity and promotional plans are in progress although we are running out of ideas but we are still going strong"..

"Alright alright,i know you can do it,i've always had a soft spot for you than that your gullible brother"

Mr Kelvin chuckled a bit

"Thank you sir,i won't disappoint you"

"You wouldn't even dare,oh and by the way is this the one?" he raised one eyebrow gesturing towards ewa.

"Well for now she's my girlfriend,we will see were life takes us" Mr Kelvin pulling a shocked Ewa towards himself so that his arms are wrapped around her waist.

"Ok,oo we'll be waiting,enjoy you night beautiful lady" he smiled at Ewa and Ewa reciprocated it with a fake smile.

As soon as chief Bankole turns away Ewa pushes his hands off her waist as she stared at Me kelvin incredulously.

"What? I'm paying you. He smirked.

"This just doesn't feel right"

"Oh it will when you receive your pay, just don't say anything but smile,are we good now"?

"Yea we're good"Ewa snapped

"So do you want a drink"?

"Yeah fanta will do" Ewa replied nonchalantly.

"Seriously girl where are you from,do you realize that this is Sheraton hotel? He asked in disbelief

"Yes I do so what you are trying to tell me now is that this "Sheraton hotel" she finger quoted.

"as big as it is does not have a bottle of fanta"she inquired

"Ok let me check"

As he turned to leave a girl walked up to them,she looked like an half-caste,her hair was tied up in to a chignon and a white strapless fish tail dress hugged her body..
Ewa immediately felt self conscious and fat in front of her.

"Abeg this babe too fine" she thought

"Heleu"(hello)

Chai she still con get British accent on top. Ewa eyed her from her beady blue eyes, caramel flawless skin to her well pedicured toenails that were showing through her nude block heels.

"Hi Cassy,fancy seeing you here".. Mr Kelvin said as he bent a little to peck her right cheek.

"Really,do you? She laughed revealing a set of sparkly white and well arranged set of tooth.

"Uhm Cassy,meet my girlfriend Ewa,Ewa meet my Ex Cassy.

Ewa thought she saw a frown on her face but it was soon replaced with an almost real smile.

"Wow kelvin you got over me pretty quick"?

"I thought as much too but on second thoughts it was for the best..they say second time is the charm right. Mr Kelvin said as he pulled Ewa towards him and planted a kiss on her head.

"Yea right, happy forever after Eva and kelvin"

"Uhm actually it's Ewa" Ewa corrected

"Oh I knew, and by the way kelvin you have oil on your lips" she smirked and did a 360 swirl as she catwalked away.

Kelvin wiped his lips with an handkerchief he took out of his breast pocket.

"Seriously she just swirled on purpose" Ewa said.

"Yea Cassy has a thing for dramatic exits except she goes overboard sometimes". Mr Kelvin laughed.

"You brought me here because of her right"? Ewa inquired.

"Yeah I did,but we failed she didn't look the least moved.Mr kelvin shrugged

"Well she did,she likes you so stop fronting". Ewa nudged him in his side.

"Really! She is the one fronting now,her Shakara sef is too much" Mr Kelvin hissed.

Ewa bursted into a fit of laughter as she clutched her stomach and threw her head back.

"Why,what's so funny".

"You--you just spoke pidgin" Ewa said amid laughter.

"See this girl oo, I'm a confirmed Lagos boy oo".. he mocked.

"You sure are" ewa doubled up again.

"You do know that I'm your boss right"?

"Oh,uhm I'm very sorry sir" Ewa straightened up wiping her teary eyes.

"You're allowed only for today" he chuckled

"Can I have this dance" he said with a smug look on his face.

"No you can't,i can't dance and these heels are killing me".

"Seriously miss bello you are such a buzz kill" he rolled his eyes

"Right back at ya" she winked.

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God bless.