Justice, the 4th hunger games book, the story after mockingjay

Chapter ten

Chapter Ten

When I awake it's still dark, I reach over to the other side of the bed, its cold. Where's Peeta? I realise I'm still fully clothed and I can hear voices downstairs, maybe it's not as late or early as I thought. Glancing at the clock on the wall I see it's half midnight, I untangle myself from the many layers of sheets and make my way across the bedroom to the door, I open it and listen, the voices are coming from downstairs so I slip out and go and sit on the bottom of the stairs to listen, I don't really feel like socialising but I don't want to miss out. I can hear them all laughing and joking, apparently Haymitch if centre of attention as most of the remarks and jokes seem to be related to him in one way or another. Suddenly the conversation takes a very serious note.

"I hope she is OK. I wonder where she is. If she's not back in the next fifteen minutes I'm going to go find her." Says a concerned Peeta and there's a couple of groans from others he must have been going on about me for a while, well he didn't look very hard if he couldn't find me.

"How is she doing? Do you think she will be able to cope with another games?" Asks Gale.

"I don't know to be honest, I fear for her at nights. She has night terrors most nights and every night when I am not there. She could attract unwanted attention from nearby tributes. I will have it easy compared to her, she will be competing at the Cornucopia with 23 criminals, some of whom will have killed before like her, most of which will not run, will stay and fight, she will be a main target for them." Peeta replies.

"We will all help as much as we can. We will all teach you as much as we know." Johanna's voice rings confidently.

"I was a career, I know many disciplines, I will help train you both." My thoughts drift to more unpleasant things, and I begin to think about what my life would have been like if my father hadn't died. What if he was still alive? Would Prim's name still have been called, would I have still volunteered for her? Yes I tell myself there isn't a situation I can think of where I wouldn't have given my life for her. Now I know there is only one other person I would give my life for, I am just terrified with the games coming up I may lose him. If I don't physically lose him in the arena i may mentally lose him. What if he has one of his turns and tries to kill me? I replay the conversation I heard between Gale and him in my head and I feel my eyes sting as they want to cry, not because I'm upset but because I am so angry and hurt that he would give me up to Gale, he spent over five years trying to fully win my heart, he had even said that he loved me since we were five and he would give me up just like that?

"Katniss?" A voice asks snapping me out of my revere and I know without looking up exactly who it is, Peeta. I don't acknowledge him, I just remain unmoving focusing on my hands, I have no idea what I must look like. I think I'm finally having that long awaited breakdown. "Katniss?" He asks again and i let out an audible sigh letting him know i'm listening. He crouches down in front of me and takes my hands in his. "Where have you been?" I can tell he is trying to keep his voice calm, trying to mask his panic. I look up into his perfect blue eyes and frown.

"Sleeping." I answer.

"What? Where?" He asks and I deepen my frown.

"In our bed." I answer simply standing up, I'm still angry at him for what he said to Gale earlier.

"No you haven't. I checked, I've looked everywhere for you. You have no idea how worried I've been, I figured you had gone hunting or something but you're usually back by now. I was just on my way out to find you. I thought you were hurt." He babbled. I take my hands back from his grasp and turn to go back upstairs but he catches my arm before I can get anywhere. I pointedly look at the door to the lounge and then back up the stairs hoping he will understand that I want to have this conversation in private. I know that even though I can hear voices protruding from the lounge that they will all be straining to hear our little exchange. He sighs and begins to climb the stairs refusing to let go of my hand he leads us into our room closing the door behind us.