The Camera That Started It All

40: All My Walls Are Caving In

The next few days this mysterious feeling I've been experiencing I feel had been getting worse. I've been spending a lot more time in bed or sleeping. I have this urge to shower every single day so I can cry and I haven't been eating as much as I normally would. I don't know if Shawn's noticed but I'm pretty sure he has.
Today feels worse than usual I have no desire to do anything at all I can't get out of bed at all. I keep asking myself "What's wrong with you Evelyn? Why are you like this?"
I finally drag myself out of bed and head to the bathroom to shower. I walk in and lock the door behind me and then I just stare at myself in the mirror. I'm a mess I hardly recognize myself anymore my hair looks horrible,my face looks drained, I look like a ghost,and I'm extremely skinny now. I pick up my brush and try and fix my hair but the knots are too much for me and they're pulling on my head too much I throw my brush on the floor out of frustration. I feel tears start to form and I fall down against the tub and let them come. I hear Shawn walking upstairs asking if I'm alright but I don't answer so he doesn't hear me crying.
"Babe? Unlock the door. Ev?"
I don't answer. I hear him jingling the doorknob trying to get into the bathroom.
"Evelyn Addison Rose please unlock this door. Eve? You're freaking me out here! EVELYN!!"
"I'm not doing anything. Don't worry. Just go away please."
"I can't do that. What's wrong?"
"I don't know anymore!"
"Unlock this door I need to make sure you're alright."
"No I'm not alright. I feel like crap 24/7 I don't know why. I don't want to do anything anymore."
"I've noticed... Is this because of everything with your family?"
I sniffed and try to catch my breath.
"Yes. No. Maybe? I don't know! I can't put my finger on it!"
"Can you unlock the door? I don't want break it down."
"Ugh fine."
I crawl over to the door and unlock it and back away then Shawn comes running in. He kneels down and hugs me.
"No more locked doors please. You scared me. You really did baby."
"I'm sorry. I-I wasn't thinking straight."
Is this what depression is? Is this the name for my mood? He looked down at my hairbrush and picked it up. Shawn moved behind me placing me in the middle of his legs. He carefully starts to work the knots out of my head. It took him about 30 minutes to get them all out. He opened the box I keep my hair ties in and grabbed one. He placed my hair in a high ponytail and carried me to bed. I've calmed down somewhat but there's still tears escaping. He gets on the bed placing me in between his legs again. I curl up into a ball under the blanket then I look up at him while he watches TV. Maybe this and my family life are connected. I hear my phone buzz and the ringtone for mom go off.
"Do you want to answer her?"
"No... I don't want to speak to her or my dad at all. This probably is because of them. It's too soon."
"Okay. Try to get some sleep Ev."
That's exactly what I did.
Shawn's POV
I haven't seen her like this in months. She doesn't deserve to feel like this at all. Her family is a huge part of who she is and now it's all crumbling and it's too much too handle. I watch her fall asleep in my arms her face is bright red with tear stains and puffy eyes but she's still beautiful to me. I fell asleep about 3 hours after her to make sure she stayed asleep. The next morning at about 11 am I hear a knock on the door while I was downstairs letting Ev sleep in. I open the door to see both her parents standing in the doorway.
"Hi Shawn. Is Evelyn here? She didn't answer my call last night."
"Hey Janine. She's upstairs sleeping still."
I could tell her father has no desire to be here at all.
"Told you it was a waste of damn time!"
"Jackson stop this isn't the time or place!"
Ummm Shawn quick think of something. Mendes contain the situation before Ev wakes up. Next think I know the sound of foot prints appear behind me.
"Shawn? What's with all this yelling?"
Once she saw both her parents she quickly hid behind me.
"You didn't answer my call last night. I was worried."
"I'm- I'm s-s-sorry I-I-I did-didn't h-h-hear m-m-m-my ph-ph-ph-phone."
She's stammering she only does that when she's scared or nervous. Her father gave Evelyn a dirty look. What the hell happened to them? I place an arm around Evelyn to try to keep her stable since I feel her shaking. Once her parents left and the front door was shut she grabbed my waist and started hugging me. My heart just broke more.