A Chance To Break Me (UNDERGOING MAJOR EDITING)

45. So, About Prom

I don't hate you, I'm just disappointed you turned out to be what you said you'd never be.

-Anonymous

~Donna ~

I was slowly walking home alone through the sixth street after I'd parted ways with Delilah who did not want to 'risk her life' taking the route. I kicked the pebbles from the path I was taking but my mind was really far away, focused the boy who lately never seemed to leave my mind at peace. Not only had Anton broken my heart but he'd also lied about not getting back with Ellery. I know what I saw today. He and Ellery were making out by his locker and he seemed to enjoy every second of it. Perhaps I would have let it slide if it was just me who saw it and blame it on my mind for seeing things but as it turned out, it wasn't only me who saw the scene unfold before my eyes. He was kissing her, that full lip lock tongue to throat french kiss that had everyone staring in wonderment while doing damage to my already damaged heart.

Til now I had no idea why I kept staring on, maybe a part of me just wanted him to catch my gaze so I could run away dramatically like they do in those Mexican soap operas but perhaps the other part of me was trying to understand how he could be kissing her so freely in front of everyone when I had to practically beg him to kiss me the day before. It was really sad how in the snap of a finger, Anton could turn from the reason I woke up smiling to the reason I cried myself to sleep with my mom checking up on me every two minutes to make sure I didn't try to hurt myself.

I knew that he had known Ellery way longer than he had known me, I couldn't even try to compete with that but only now did I fully understand that I could never replace her. The two...

A tear dropped my eye as I tried to admit it to myself, to accept that-

... the two were meant for each other. I was just an object that was there to distract them so that they could both realize just how much they loved each other and if any, I only made them appreciate their love, making their bond even stronger. I would get through it. One way or another. But, why did it hurt so much?

I felt like I couldn't take one more step so I sank down on the dirty ground in the middle of the alley willing myself to calm down. I really hope one day Anton will cry for me as I'm crying for him. He just had to go screw Ellery and soon after break up with me.

"Well screw you!" I shouted in the alley as my voice bounced through the walls sending echoes all around me. Then I began crying again, which was common for me these days.

"I hate you so much." I whispered the lie to myself. I wished I could hate him. My shoulders were heaving as I sat on the hard ground crying with my locks falling on either side of my head but I didn't fail to see the shadow that suddenly overcame my presence as two figures appeared before me. I fell back in surprise as my Visage cleared and two of my street friends Raul and Cracker were looking down at me.

"Doughnut?" Cracker called.

I shakily rose to my feet keeping my head down as I did not want them to see me crying. All the four of them were used to me being a tough nut and I wanted to keep it that way.

"Hey guys." I nodded at them and started on my way but Raul grabbed my arm to stop me.

"You're crying." He stated as if I didn't know it.

"I'ma break someone's neck if those ain't tears of joy Doughnut."

"Its nothing." I hurriedly said and tried to walk away again. I should have known better.

"Is it that white boyfriend of yours?" Raul asked stepping in front of me.

At my silence, Cracker snickered. "Gurl, whatchu doing hanging out with rich white kids anyway?"