My Freshmen Year and Its Secrets

Chapter 12: Heartbreaker Strikes Again

It's crazy how badly things can go in a matter of minutes. It's the third weekend of November and Lyle and I are Skyping.

"What would you do if we broke up?" he asked me.

I was shocked. Is this a trick question? "Um... I don't know."

"Do you want to?" He questioned, no joking in his tone.

"No," Realization hit me, "but you do."

"Well. I don't know... I just. I don't think we can date now, I mean, I'm in middle school, you're in high school, it's just too hard for us." he looked away from my eyes.

The lump in my throat began to form and I blinked back tears. I calmed myself down and forced a smile. I had perfected my fake smile, so it looks like I'm the same happy Katrina I always am, "Lyle, that makes a lot of sense! We should just wait until high school, right?" Please say yes.

"Totally!" he smiled at me, seeming glad that I took it well.

"Awesome! Well, I gotta go do chores and study and all that fun crap." I rolled my eyes, which was hard to do with tears in them.

"Oh, ok, cool! See yah!"

"Bye."

..........

Adam is online.

I called him right away as I slowly broke down.

He answered, "Hey Katrina. So, I have to show you this- hey. Katrina? What's wrong? What happened?" His excited smile turned into a worried frown when he saw me crying. My slow trails of tears turned into a waterfall of wet, slaty grossness.

"Lyle broke up with me." is all I could manage to say before I burst into sobs.

"What? No... Katrina... I'm so sorry... Hey, you're gonna be ok, I promise. I'm here for you..." I could barely make out his words through my sobs.

The funny thing about being in a relationship is the fact that the relationship can be as innocent as a child, but it can still hurt when it's over. Lyle and I had only dated for while, but the countless kisses, hugs, hand holding, and fun made it feel like a lifetime. A lifetime that I wanted to keep.

It just hurt. Hurt to know the next time I saw Lyle, I wouldn't be able to kiss him. To hold him. To touch him.

"Katrina... Why did you guys break up?" Adam asked me when I finally calmed down.

That question, of course, made me burst into tears again and more choking noises escaped my mouth.

It was disgusting and humiliating.

"Oh gosh... I'm sorry Katrina, I won't talk about it anymore... I just. I've never seen you this upset. I don't really know what to do or how to help... Do you want to talk about something else? No? Um. Do you want to hear about this dream I had? Probably not, it was pretty boring anyways..." Adam rambled on and on while I sobbed. I had literally cried for 5 hours.

I wasn't that upset over the break up. It was everything combined. Stress, school, my grandma, Lyle, my feelings to Adam, everything. I was just so confused, hurt and sad that I didn't know what to do.

"Adam. Can we skype until I fall asleep? We don't have to talk, I just- I don't want to be alone." I said softly, my voice cracking.

Adams expression softened, "Sure. If you want to talk about it, about anything, I'm here."

A few moments pass without us talking until I quietly say, "Thank you Adam."

Adam looked at me, confused, "For what? I made you cry, like, 5 times."

I laughed a little, "Thank you for helping me and being here for me. I really appreciate it. And thanks for not laughing at my disgusting crying face."

Adam sighed and said, "It's what any person with a heart would do. And your crying face isn't even that bad. Mine is so much worse."

I giggled, "I bet it is. I mean, your face is already screwed up. Crying would only make it worse!" I teased.

"Hey! Don't make fun of my beautiful face." Adam said in a high pitch voice.

Minutes ticked by, hours passed. Soon, the talked ceased to me replying with 'mhm' and 'yeah'. My eyes drifted shut, my breathing slowed and my mind shut off.

But I was still awake when I heard Adam say, "Why are you so perfect? Ugh. I really do love you Katrina Swanson. Please don't cry over that scum bag. Goodnight."

And with that, he ended the call and I fell asleep peacefully for the first time in weeks.