《apartment 201• a.i》

seventeen

[listen to Never Be while reading this bc wow]

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{Jay}

We stood in front of the door for what seemed like forever. I didn't know how they would take all this.

Would they do anything to make me stay?

Will they hate Ashton?

Will they hate me?

"Jay" Ashton whispered, breaking me from my thoughts. I looked up into his shimmering eyes and he leaned down to kiss my forehead. "You can do this."

I simply nodded and finally brought my shaky hand up to knock on the door. Within a few seconds of waiting Michael opened the door and stood frozen, with his eyes wide. He then blinked a few times, obviously not believing what he saw at his doorstep.

"Jay" he said, barely audible. It all hit me now about how much I've missed them. My eyes started to get glossy and so did his. He smiled at me and held open his arms, inviting me in for a hug. I gladly took the invitation and held onto him tightly. I missed his hugs, I missed everything about this place.

After a few minutes of staying in his embrace I saw Luke over Michael's shoulder. He had the same surprised look on his face as Michael had. "Luke" I said, as I walked over closer to him. He pulled me in for a suffocating hug, but I didn't mind at all.

"I've missed you so much.." He said softly as he rubbed my back.

"I've missed you too" I responded as he finally let me go. I knew I would be bombarded with questions soon and took the chance to explain to them before they could start asking.

"But I have something to tell you two-"

"Wait," Luke cut me off before I could start explaining "who's this?" He asked as he pointed over to Ashton, who was still standing by the door.

I looked over at him and smiled. I was about to introduce him before he spoke up. "I'm Ashton, I was, uh, with Jay the whole time during the whole incident.." He walked up to me and slipped his arm around my waist.

"Oh, so this is Ashton?" Michael questioned. I forgot that I had mentioned him when they tried to get me out.

"Yeah it is." I paused and took a deep breath, "and I have some explaining to do to you guys. We should probably sit down."

We all took a seat in the living room after many offers from Luke and Michael to get us drinks or food. "Okay, so what's this you have to tell us?" Luke asked, looking somewhat nervous.

"Okay, here it goes" I sighed and then continued to tell them every thing. From when I first got caught and dragged into that terrible place, to the incident that had happened only a little while ago. I went on and on for many minutes and they all just listened. They were always great listeners, that's why they're my best friends, and Ashton just sat next to me, holding onto my hand to encourage me to keep going. I was so lucky to have these people in my life, but two were about to be blindsided by what I had to tell them next.

I explained everything that I had talked about with Ashton and it was so fucking hard. I had tears surfacing but I pushed them back, knowing that if I let the fall that I would lose it and not be able to continue. Michael and Luke looked shattered. Michael just starred at the ground and Luke looked at me like I was crazy.

"What?!" Luke jumped up from his place on the couch and started pacing. "Jay, you can't be serious. I-I mean you literally just came back into our life and now you're leaving again!" He threw his hands up and then tugged at his blonde hair.

"I'm so sorry" I said, just barely above a whisper. I moved my gaze to the floor, afraid that if I looked at their hurt expressions that I would break down. Ashton squeezed my hand and gave me a reassuring smile. I didn't bother to return the smile because I knew he would see right through it.

Luke continued to pace and shake his head. "I just don't understand why you can't just stay here with us? Both of you can, I just can't lose you again Jay." His eyes were becoming glossy and I couldn't bare to keep looking at him but I had to.

"I can't Luke," I sighed and ran my hand through my messy hair, "I wasn't expecting you to understand. We have to leave this town.."

"No you don't! I know how much you say you hate it here, hell we all hate it here! But we're not running away from it, so you don't have to either!" Luke kept protesting but I wasn't going to give into him no matter how much I hated seeing him like this.

"Luke I killed a man! Do you know what will happen if they come after me? If I stay here then it'll be so easy for them to find me! I don't want to risk that, I have to go!" My voice grew louder as I spoke, I needed to get my point past them and get them to let me go.

He didn't reply right away to me. He didn't have to though, I knew I had gotten through to him. "Okay okay, I understand, but can we still keep in contact? I don't want to completely forget about you" he said softly and I saw a single tear run down his cheek.

I let out a deep breath and blinked hard. "We can find a way Luke. I don't have a phone anymore obviously, neither of us do." I said motioning between me and Ashton. "But I will definitely find some way to talk to you, okay?" I slightly smiled at him and wiped a tear that had run down my face.

He simply nodded and held his arms out for me again. "C'mere."

Ashton let go of my hand and I stood up and crashed into Luke, who now had many tears running down his face. He held me tighter than ever and I buried my face into his shoulder. "Never forget me Jay."

"I couldn't even if I tried" I replied. We finally pulled apart and I saw Michael finally looking up at me and then he got on his feet.

"I'm gonna miss you so much" he said quickly before wrapping his arms around me.

"I'll miss you too Michael.." I said, letting more tears fall and stain his black shirt, "so much."

Michael finally let me go and I looked at them and then at Ashton. He nodded at me as if to tell me it's time, I nodded back and he stood up and took my hand again.

"Well" I said with tears still falling, dampening my cheeks, "looks like this is it.." I took a deep breath and looked at both of them again. "I'll miss you guys, thanks for being such good friends to me."

Michael nodded and wiped the tears from his face. "Bye Jay.." he said softly.

"Bye.." I forced out, hating the word. My voice cracked as it came out and I saw them both wave at me before I turned around.

Me and Ashton walked out of the apartment that I've grown to love so much, but it will now become just a memory. I walked past Luke'a beat up car and remembered all the memories the four of us had in that car. Now there were only three of us left and only two still yet together. As I walked past a chipped piece of sidewalk I smiled and remember how Michael was attempting to skateboard and hit the corner of the sidewalk so hard that it chipped off and he fell off of the skateboard and fractured his wrist.

The two of us walked hand-in-hand and in silence down the road and once we reached the end of the block that's when I lost it.

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(AN: I don't know how I feel about this chapter. But I like the ending of it though omg. This was probably the most emotional chapter I've even written.

Please tell me what you think of the chapter and the entire story bc hardly anyone comments and votes anymore. And I'm sorry that my updates have been so spaced out I just keep forgetting to update sorry.

Anyway, I just watched the Amnesia music video and holy shit I'm emotional. It was so amazing omfg.

Comment, vote, send me a message, anything really, I like talking to you guys. ily!)