The Boy With The Blank Stare

Chapter Eleven: I'm sorry

"DON'T YOU DARE LET GO OUMA!" Momota screamed and I struggled to break free from their grasp. D*MN IT! EVERY TIME! DO YOU HATE ME GOD?!

I continued to fight him with clawing at his hand and squirming till he pulled me over the railing and grabbed me tightly to make sure I couldn't escape.

"Why...why did you do that? What's wrong Ouma?" Momota asked calmly. Everything, everything is wrong in this world! It's nothing but a cruel and uncaring planet!

I struggled a bit more against his grasp "I'm so glad I saw you and Harukawa going upstairs...please...please just tell me why" Momota begged.

You wouldn't understand, you never known what I know

I could tell he was getting desperate for an answer "how could you be so selfish?!" He screamed and I stopped struggling.

"Everyone in class...everyone who knows you, don't you know how upset they would be if you died?" I shut my eyes tightly to contain tears, they don't care about me. They either pity me or hate me...and the ones that hate me are the only ones willing to tell the truth.

"Is this what she wanted for you? IS this what they wanted for you?! I may not have known you like you do but I know d*mn well they wouldn't want you dying on them!"

It hurts...it hurts...it hurts...it hurts to much...

I couldn't hold back my tears as I cried and I covered my mouth and face in a desperate attempt to conceal my face from any onlookers.

"...now tell me, why were you on the roof? Even if I don't understand...please...tell me..." Momota asked.

'Everything's a mess...this world...I can't even sleep at night because every time I close my eyes I'm back there again...my Mother hates me...the teacher hates me...and I'm useless...I can't even do anything on my own anymore...and...I just want it to go away...the pain...'

I signed and I could tell he was watching as I couldn't control my tears and he just let me cry.

"I-I'm s-sorry..I-I'm s-sorry...M-Momota..."

-Saihara's POV-

H

mm I wonder what she's going to make for dinner tonight-

I was walking on the rooftop when I see Momota carrying Ouma. My eyes widened in shock "what happened?!" I asked and he sighed "he tried again" he said.

Tried again? What does he- no...no he couldn't mean that...Ouma tried to kill himself?

"What..." I started and Momota sighed "well good thing your here, grab his chair for me? He fell asleep" I raised an eyebrow.

"Fell asleep?" I asked and Momota nodded "yeah, or fell unconscious...it was just as he didn't have enough energy to cry he just fell asleep..." he recounted.

"I should have known...I should have paid more attention...it was so close that time...just five seconds..." he whispered to himself yet I overheard.

This has to end...I need to know why...

"But...today I think I finally broke through...somehow...someway" Momota said smiling "how?" I asked and Momota grinned.

"He finally spoke" and my eyes widened "he talked to you?" Momota nodded "just one sentence...yet...I haven't heard his voice since it happened...so something tells me this will be the last time I find him here..." he said confidently.

"Really? How do you know? Maybe we should call the hospital...if he keeps trying things like that it might be best to put him in a mental institution-"

"Because I believe in him" Momota said "even when everyone else is going to give up, I won't" he said "he's in there...somewhere...and no matter how long it takes...I'm going to find him"

Wow...such determination...I caught myself looking at Ouma who looked completly and utterly broken, I wonder...if he can succeed.

"I'm going to the nurses office stop by when you can" Momota said continuing to walk forward and I nodded.

Ouma...I don't understand why he would try and kill himself...he has a family right? And so many friends...sure his body is broken...but that can't be the reason...right?

I asked myself as I grabbed his chair and started heading off to the nurse's office.

-/-/-

"I'm here" I said and Momota nodded "that's good I was just about to call his Mom" Ouma was lying down on one of the cots in the room and I set the chair beside him.

"You have her number?" I asked and he nodded "of course, it's our job to help look after him since his Mother can't be there that often"

I raised an eyebrow "what do you mean?" I asked and Momota sighed "I don't know everything...but Ouma's Dad used to be abusive...and he took it out on his Mother a lot...and she would drink a lot...

"I hear...she used to hit Ouma when she was drunk cause she wasn't thinking straight...and it was somehow his fault...

"His Dad died, I think he got in an accident...and his Mom moved here for therapy and to get help...

"I think they were better...Ouma was always happy back then, but again, we weren't close. So maybe that was a lie.

"After the incident she told us to look after Ouma during school hours"

I raised an eyebrow "why doesn't she do that? It's her son" Momota shrugged "I don't know...I need to call her though, I promised I would last time"

I nodded "I'll look after him, go ahead" and Momota gave me a thumbs up "thanks" and headed into the hallway.

I found myself staring at Ouma, at first I thought he was all alone in this...and yet the more I find out...the less sense this all makes...how he went a 180 on his personality, why he keeps doing this to himself, and I still don't even have a clue as to what happened...will...I ever figure it all out?

I snapped out of my thoughts when I saw Ouma uneased and his face seemed pained as if having a nightmare and instinctively I pulled the cot's blanket further up and patted his head and he seemed to calm down.

I hope he speaks to me one day...

A/N: Is it just me or is this turning into more of an Oumamota? That was not the intention.