Air ⇔Shawn Mendes V. Lauren Jauregui

I don't deserve you

LANA

The next week or so was full of recording in the studio with no breaks, but this week we are free to do whatever. Colby was the first person I planned to visit.

My uber pulled up to the familiar gate, I typed the code on the lock and walked in. Before I even got halfway to the door, Cory was running out followed by the rest of the house. They all ran to give me a hug, but I noticed Colby was not here. I gave Sam a questioning look and he just shrugged. "No one has heard from him since yesterday." This made me uneasy, Colby was not one to run off especially without telling Sam. "Don't worry about him, he probably went out with others and spent the night at someone's house." I nodded slightly and followed them all inside.

After an hour of catching up and joking around, Cory, Aaron, and Devyn had to leave. So Sam asked Jake and me to be in a video. Of course we both agreed and asked what it was, which he replied to, saying that it is a surprise but involves the pool. Sam set everything up while Jake and I swam, I noticed many blow ups and pool toys had been laid out. The feeling of being tugged underwater caught my attention and I managed to get a breathe before I went under. When I came back up Jake laughed at his 'prank' of sorts as I pushed him jokingly. "Okay you two lets film this video."

The video ended up just being us battling on floaties and repeatedly falling. At one point Sam fell and made Jake and me fall as well. We had been recording for about 2 hours and it looked as if no one was home yet. "We don't know when and if Colby is coming home so you can just spend the night in his room later tonight." "Yeah I'll just do that, should I try to call him and see where he is, or just leave it?" Sam shrugged and looked at Jake, who also shrugged. "Maybe just leave it, for all we know his phone could be dead or something. He'll show up at some point." Sam said as he got us towels. My phone started to ring from the kitchen, I ran to the kitchen and answered it. "Hello?"
"Hey it's Cory."
"Oh what's up? You guys okay?"
"Yeah we're fine I just called to ask if you are spending the night? Oh! Also has anyone heard from Colby yet?"
"Yes I'm spending the night and no, none of us have heard from Colby."
"Okay! I swear I just saw Colby though. I saw this guy that looks just like him at this restaurant."

My face dropped as he mentioned this.
"Cory can you put Devyn on the phone please?"
I heard him sigh and then whispering,
"It's me Hun."
"Dev was he with a girl?"
"I'm not going to lie to you, yes he was. I've never seen her before."
I didn't reply to her, my arm dropped, bringing the phone away from my ear.
"Lana, I'm coming home okay? I'll bring ice cream and all kinds of goodies. We all love you alright? Just remember that. I'll see you in 10 minutes."

I heard the sound of the call ending as I placed it on the counter again. Tears lingered dangerously close to spilling over. "S-Sam?" I choked out before letting the tears fall. My head was in my hands as I slid down the flat surface of the cabinets and counter top. Footsteps could be heard all throughout the house, bounding down the stairs and into the kitchen. I heard a faint,"Oh no" before I was wrapped in someone's arms as they attempted to comfort me. "He's o-out with a g-girl." My mind could not comprehend what had happened but my heart was shattered. It was like I could feel my heart breaking, the same way it did with Dylan, and the same way it did with Shawn. It felt as if someone had been pumping my heart for me, keeping me alive, but all of the sudden the person stopped and they let my heart stop, it felt like they let me die.

I was a hyperventilating mess and was well aware of it. Many past problems popping up in the matter of seconds, anxiety, depression, panic disorder. All coming back when I had just beat them. Familiar voices surrounded me, Jake and Sam have me wrapped in their arms, both holding me tightly. "You need to breathe with me okay? You and I practiced this just incase. We're gonna practice again. In... Out... In... Out... There you go, keep doing it." I could hear Sam talk me through my many exercises to calm myself down, but I could not see him. The tears in my eyes made my vision blurry and in my mind I knew that seeing him would aid to calming me down, but I couldn't see him. I relied on the breathing exercises, they didn't do much but after awhile I could manage.