Make believe

Chapter 20

I woke up the next morning to an empty house; both my parents already gone. As I stepped out of bed, I realized I never really saw them anymore. I was always either with Aubree, the boys, or up in my room reading or writing. My curtains had been shut when I awoke, dimming the room and creating a depressing feel. I walked over and opened them, letting a stream of sunlight in to illuminate the drab place.

Walking in to my bathroom, I felt the transfer of the hardwood floors of my bedroom to the cold, clean linoleum of the bathroom on my bare feet. I stared at myself in the mirror and noticed no bags underneath my grey eyes. My eyes looked alive; bright and wide. I had woken up that day in a unexplainable good mood. Just feeling happy and content and at peace. I decided to take a long shower to help wash away the memories of the day before.

The metal handle squeaked as I turned it, allowing a shower of warm water to begin falling. After removing my clothes, I stepped in and immediately relaxed. I felt my muscles loosen and tension release from my body. The hot water fell at a soothing pace, the sound of it splashing against the walls and tub, calming. I closed my eyes, and suddenly, I wasn't in the shower, I was in the middle of the street. Full from dinner and high on excitement, I remembered dancing in the rain while Luke watched on from underneath an umbrella attached to an outside eating table. I don't know what came over me that night; I was never one to be particularly loud or daring, but it was something I had always wanted to do. Always imagined as I silently watched it pour from my window. And at that moment, it seemed like as good a time as any.

I remember feeling the blasts of ice-cold water falling down and covering me, dripping down my bare back and dampening my hair as my heels brushed against the pavement. And I felt alive.

I opened my eyes.

Sadly, that beautiful night was over, and here I was, alone, in the shower with nothing to accompany me but my thoughts. The moments that made up that evening clouded my thoughts as I turned the heat up on the water. The unknown was floating in the air, what was to come waited patiently in the back of our minds. It was exhilarating, not knowing what was to come of our relationship. It was a beautiful start to a soon-to-be complicated relationship.

After washing my hair, then my body, I cut the water off and stood in the deafening silence a little while longer. For the first time in a while, I wished my parents were home. I longed for their approval and wished for their love; though I know I had it, I wanted it to be expressed. Showed. I pulled a comfortable, plain black dress over my head and walked down the steps to wander the halls. The only sound was my bare feet brushing against the wood floors and for a second, I thought I might go crazy from the silence. Suddenly, I was very angry.

Angry at my parents for never being around and leaving me in this big, old house to find things to fill my days. Angry at myself for finding nothing and choosing to lay across the kitchen counter and just think.

Iv been thinking an awful lot lately. Not that I didn't before, but I used to be able to find things to occupy my mind. My thoughts. Now a days, a find myself sprawled across my bed; spread across the couch and just thinking.

I never knew how much there was to think about until I didn't have anything else to do but explore my mind.

The day went by slowly and consisted of lying on the couch and getting lost in my favorite 50's mystery novel. Around noon, I had an apple. While I ate, I received a text from Ashton, wanting to meet up for smoothies. I considered declining; staying at home and to myself seemed comforting and right. But something gnawed at me in the back of my mind, telling me to get myself out of that house. And suddenly, a lightbulb went off.

That was the perfect time and situation to introduce Aubree to the boys. Texting Ashton back, I told him that I'd love to meet him at Anna's Cafe, then asked if I could bring a friend. He said 'of course', then we decided on a time to meet. After the time was set, I set my phone down and took a deep breath. Leaning farther in to the couch, I sighed and mentally prepared myself for the day to come. What if Aubree and the boys didn't get on well? What if this smoothie date would turn into an afternoon of awkward silences and accidental eye contact?

I hoped not. After a few moments, I grabbed my phone and dialed Aubree's number. She, of course, picked up on the second ring and immediately asked me how I was doing. We chatted for a few minutes until I asked her if she wanted to meet me and a few friends at the Cafe for smoothies.

"Will these friends consist of four Australian, teenage boys, one of whom, you're in love?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not in love with him. And yes, Ashton just texted me..and I want you guys to meet."

"Finally. It's about time! Really Laraine-"

"Leave in like, ten minutes okay?" I interrupted.

She said she would, then the line went dead. I climbed the stairs to my bedroom, then to my bathroom. Quickly, I checked my slight makeup and put my hair up in a high pony tail. I walked through the front door, making sure it was locked behind me. My nerves were high as I walked down the road, both nervous and excited for the day to come.