"I never would have known 'I'm fine' meant 'save me' all along"
-seokjin
Discontinued :')
Warnings:
○self harm
○extreme dieting
○eating disorder/vomiting
○fainting
(will be updated as story progresses)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
After the members ate their breakfast, Namjoon informed them they had to leave for practice. They scattered amongst themselves to gather certain necessities they would need for the time there. But of course, Seokjin had other plans.
Making his way to his private bathroom - locking both his bedroom and bathroom doors in the process - he knelt in front of the toilet. He needed to be quick with this since they had to leave soon. Taking two of his fingers he inserted them to the back of his throat and applied pressure. Once he started to gag he removed his fingers and hunched over the bowl releasing his contents. He needed to take some time to recover since he really didn't like the feeling of vomiting - but what other choice did he have? He took one last deep breath before getting up and leaning over to flush the toilet.
Bye bye breakfast.
After he freshened up his mouth he rushed to gather his bag from the corner of his room and his coat from the closet then left to wait by the front door for the others. Soon enough everyone was gathered and was ready to leave.
"The company car should be here in a minute." Said Namjoon while reading the text of his phone.
From the corner of Seokjin's eye he could see Taehyung and Jimin practicing the hand movements from one of the choreos they had practiced yesterday. He turned his face towards the wall to hide his grimace. He really dreaded all of their dance practices because of how pathetic they make him look. After a couple minutes a honk from outside alerted them and they were on their way.
Five minutes into the car ride Hoseok decided to ask their manager which dances they were to be practicing today. They learned they were going to be practicing Save Me and their new songs DNA and Go Go. Seokjin's stomach turned.
"Are you okay?" Someone whispered in his ear. He brought his eyes up to meet their Yoongi's.
"Y-yeah."
"Are you sure? You seem tense." Yoongi pointed out by nodding his head in the direction of Seokjin's lap. Both his hands were clenched into tight fists and his right leg was bouncing quite rapidly against the seat. Now that the subject was brought up, he could feel how tightly his jaws were clamped together.
Who knew the thought of dancing could do this to me? Oh wait, I did.
Seokjin relaxed both his hands so they lay flattly against his thighs which calmed down the bouncing of his leg.
"I'm fine, I promise." He knew he didn't sound convincing at all, he would have if it werent for his stutter, clenched fists, and shaky leg but if Yoongi noticed - which he's smart enough to do so - he didn't say anything about it. And Seokjin couldn't have been any more greatful.
---
They had arrived 10 minutes ago and they were now in formation to practice Save Me and Seokjin was a jittery mess. He could feel his thighs about to give and they hadn't even started moving yet. The knot in his stomach was growing and he felt he was going to vomit if he got anymore nervous.
