Save Me; A Seokjin Centric

xiii

'tear'

"It's just... something's not right."

-

It was another day off given to the group and the three found themselves huddled up in Yoongi's studio. They hadn't planned to do much in there seeing as they wanted to spend majority of their day relaxing and lounging around rather than doing actual work. The most they'd do on a day like this was play around with some beats and jot down some lyrics if they had ever came to mind. They had a little routine of what they called "test and match" to see which lyric(s) fit with what beat.

But a this point in their careers, they had a lot of forgotten or stray beats lying around in the many hard drives they've come to own so what they would do is listen and evaluate - finding what needs to be improved and fixing them. They would never delete or throw anything away though, preferring to instead better what they've come up with to fit the vibe they were looking for. Because in all honesty, it would be a shame having hard work thrown away like that just because it "wasn't good enough". But at the end of the day it was a win-win situation for the three because not only were they getting some work done, they found a type of therapy by doing something they love.

However, today seemed to be a little different than most. Although then again, the past couple of weeks for the group haven't exactly been... normal. But today there laid a funny feeling within the leader of bangtan, a feeling he couldn't exactly place a finger on. He didn't exactly know what the cause of it was, but what he does know is that he started to feel on edge a few days after Seokjin was released from the hospital.

It affected him in a way he didn't know, and he wasn't sure if anyone else in the group felt the same way. It wasn't like he was afraid to ask the other five about it... in fact he really wanted to do so because of the amount of weight that would lift off his shoulders, it's just he feared that maybe all of his sudden feelings and inklings were just nothing but him being paranoid.

But to Namjoon, the word "paranoid" seemed like the incorrect word. He's had these thoughts and conversations with himself many times in the past enough to know that he is not paranoid about Seokjin. But maybe... just maybe... he's...

Suspicious?

But the question heavily dawns on him; why should he have any reason to be suspicious about Seokjin? Because taken everything together, the world literally turned its back on Seokjin in so many ways the day he collapsed on stage. They got to know about his conditions, his mental illnesses, they even saw his fucking scars for god's sake. They found out about some of Seokjin's darkest secrets and...

... it hurts. It hurts Namjoon that they were never going to truly know about the darkesses that consumed their eldest brother. It hurts him that even after years of friendship, Seokjin still didn't trust him enough to tell him what was going on. He thought they were better than that. He could've sworn that the bond they shared was one of the strongests in the whole group.