Atlas: FTWD (Nick/Troy) Fanfiction

08 // heirloom

"you try your hardest to leave the past alone"

heirloom, sleeping at last

heirloom - something passed down in a family for generations

Troy

After that tumultuous weekend, Nick and I somewhat went back to normal, if you consider our normal to be smoking together and ignoring everything that occurred Saturday night. Neither of us are big on discussing our feelings, we're more the kind of people who write it all down and shove it away, hoping those feelings will never surface.

Healthy, I know.

As I make the long walk to my Lit. class, I can't help but overthink everything Nick said that night in his drug-induced state. He was absolutely out of his mind, but I believe everything he told me. It's incredible how much the two of us have in common - both of us basically running from our families and anything that could tie us to it, both our fathers shitty, both feeling inadequate. Except when we're together. That's the only time I can say that I feel as if I actually belong somewhere. And, even though he has Lucy, I get the feeling he feels the same with me.

Once I get to class, I quickly find my seat and I'm slightly relieved not to see Nick. I still can't tell why I'm so hung up on that night, maybe it's because I'm afraid to face him sober. A few minutes pass by as students filter in and Nick eventually becomes one of them, taking his seat next to me.

"Hey," We both greet and I don't fail to notice his hands slightly twitching under his desk. I elect not to comment on it; who the hell am I to be pointing out weird twitches?

"So, for this week's theme, I want you all to focus on the idea of heredity and having something passed down in your family. Is there anything in your family that's been passed on to you, negative or positive? Doesn't matter which, just write about it," Mather instructs and I freeze up at this idea. The last thing I'd choose to focus on is what has been passed down my damn family tree. Nothing good up there.

With five minutes left, I glance down at my paper to see I've only written one line. One damn line in one hour. Along with all the scribbles that I crossed out after I realized they were too damn sensitive or personal. I sneak a peek at Nick's journal to see him - like always - furiously writing away as if he might lose the words if he doesn't get them all down now. Damn, wish I knew what that was like - having too many words to explain your thoughts. For me, it's the exact opposite, I never have any words to describe myself.

"Alright, I'll see you all tomorrow. Troy, can I speak to you for a moment?" He calls me out as I'm grabbing my few things and my heart almost stops. What the hell could my professor want? Hesitantly, I make my way over to his desk and he glances up from whatever the hell papers he's reading and smiles softly.

"Something got you distracted?" He questions and I suck in a breath, shaking my head quickly.

"It's alright, this isn't high school, you're not in any trouble. If the coursework is too hard for you, there's still time to-"

"No, it's not," The idea of switching out of my favorite class because my dumbass self can't think of anything to jot down about my family is about one of the lamest ways to go I think of. Mather only nods silently and dismissively and I make my way out quickly, wanting to leave that awkward conversation as soon as possible. As I exit the room, I glance down the hallway to see if Nick's waiting for me, but there's no sign of him. Ignoring the slight disappointment I feel that he just left me, I turn the other way and start on my way to the car. I've almost reached the parking lot when I hear raised hushed voices off down another hallway. Unable to quell my insatiable curiosity, I lurk closer to the voices. Just as I'm turning the corner, I see Nick and Lucy facing one another, hard looks on both their faces and I can immediately tell they're fighting by their rigid stances and slight distance between each other.