If Only (Prompt: Sudden)

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Ever heard someone say, 'it was a bolt from the blue?' In my case I was hit by a truckload of such bolts when Martha said, 'Spike, I am dying.'

'Don't give up yet. There must be a way out. Early days,' I said trying to see if she was game for salvage.

'Nope. I've fought a long, hard battle. I don't have it in me to continue, Spike. I'd rather burn once than every once in a while," she said with a calmness that made my stomach turn.

Long, hard battle? Does that mean... 'It's been a year now,' she said as though she had read my mind. I staggered back, my hands looking for something to hold on to. Martha steadied me with her frail hands. A year and I knew nothing. What a waste of time. I could've...

Now, we've not had the best of times and have been living apart, except for the occasional thaw that would see us run into each others' arms, talk, fight, part acrimoniously, tell each other we would rather see each other dead, go home and wait for the next thaw. Every time we met, she seemed to get worse. I didn't care much though - I thought she was as frustrated as I was. I was unkempt for most parts too, going by what the mirror had to show. And so, the obvious didn't strike me. When Martha finally said she'd soon say goodbye forever, the reality hit me like a ton of bricks.

'I thought I should spare you the trauma. I thought I would win, live and surprise you. At the same time, I wondered what it would mean to you if I lost.' Martha continued. 'I wanted you to get used to life without me, Spike.' I shook my head, distraught.

'A year, Martha? Why did you not tell me earlier. I could've...'

'Done nothing,' Martha said, cutting me short. 'We could've done nothing. Life is short, Spike. Mine will be a tad shorter. That is all. Goodbye,' she said and headed off even before I could blink. A part of me was gone for good.

'You've robbed me. Deprived me,' I wanted to scream so even the heavens would hear. I didn't. Sense of propriety, you see. 

If only she had told me earlier, Sasha would've stayed.

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⏰ Last updated: Sep 21, 2018 ⏰

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