Shhh! Scribbler at Work

The Cat's Miaow

(prompt: 'argument' 21/9/2018)

Short-trimmed, ultra-neat hairstyle, with such an earnest expression on a clean, scrubbed face emerging from his whiter-than-white business shirt, kept tightly closed with a Windsor-knotted paisley-print tie. His suit was impeccable - every crease sharp as though steam-pressed a moment ago. In other circumstances I'd have been deeply impressed - no argument with that. But at our farm door? On a perfectly ordinary milking day (as ALL seven days per week tended to be, back then)? THIS was novel.

He must be lost, I remember thinking. But with a brilliant, win-your-heart-AND-total-confidence-type voice, he dispelled my doubts, saying, "Good morning... Mrs. Larsen, isn't it?" And although I was still such a newlywed I still tended to look back over my shoulder for my mother-in-law whenever someone said 'Mrs. Larsen', I nodded, encouraging him to continue, "I'm John Doe from BIFF dog foods, here to address your complaint."

Despite my surprise, all suddenly came clear. Some weeks earlier I composed and wrote a letter of complaint following our inability to buy any but the new metric version of their large cans of dog food. For the longest time we had fed two dogs and one cat from BIFF's cans, supplemented with working dog biscuits and tasty treatie-type biscuits for our beloved cat.

Hot on the heels of Australia's decimal currency conversion, various goods and foods joined the metrication march. Mostly this was a popular practice, it being so much easier to divide or multiply all by ten. But much distrust emerged and flourished when said metrication saw a shortfall in some well-known and popular items. Same-sized cans, but with a shortfall in the fill level to meet the newly defined weight. BIFF dog food was a prime example.

Simply stated, as expressed in my letter to the manufacturer, our cat's share was missing. I further expressed my concern as to our cat's future well-being, as she had an exclusive preference for BIFF dog food and refused to eat anything else. Consequently, our dogs share had to be reduced to accommodate this other furry love of our lives. As there was no change to the pricing to reflect this reduced amount, ALL of us were losers, and I found myself in the unhappy situation of needing to question their integrity.

**I should add, I have used the 'integrity' word on several complaining-type occasions with great success, but this one? Well-ll-ll... Out of the ball-park!

Young Mr. Doe proceeded to apologise profusely for this neglect of our cat, explaining that it would take some time before all their cans and handling machinery were changed so there were no more gaps inside products. The Company hoped they could compensate and help our cat to reach adequate nutrition levels, with a gesture of goodwill and gratitude for our constant and faithful custom.

And he presented me with a full tray of... wait for it ... 24 large cans of BIFF dog food!!