Westley has always known Claire. She's always been a constant in his life, whether it be as his babysitter, his secret Santa, as his pretend-girlfriend, his confident, as the person he could always rely on.
But she's also always been the girl he lov...
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I'm thirty three and I'm a dad.
Back when we were dating, Claire had a miscarriage. She was barely three weeks pregnant though, so the loss wasn't as piercing as the first child we lost. But it still hurt.
We never used protection while having sex. We've both been tested and after everything Claire has given me there was never a second where I didn't think I wanted this with her. All I've wanted was to give her the child she so desperately wanted.
And if I'm being honest, this wasn't just about what Claire wanted. I really wanted a kid with Claire too. I wanted to create a life that would be a little part of us and that would live on even when we're gone. I wanted to create something with her.
I knew Claire had sort of given up on the idea of having kids though. After a couple of years of having sex all the time and never getting pregnant, Claire wasn't even expecting it anymore, and she didn't want to try any alternative to the natural way. When I felt Claire's body changing a bit because of the pregnancy I thought it was menopause related and I didn't want to mention anything to not sadden her.
When we learned she was pregnant, we were both equally ecstatic and worried. Claire was forty four. It was old to be pregnant. It meant it could be dangerous for Claire and for the baby.
Correction.
Babies.
We were going to have twins.
When we learned that, we kind of freaked out even more.
When people learned we were expecting twins they thought Claire had been inseminated. She hadn't, obviously. Claire was a twin too, but they had been born prematurely and her sister hadn't survived. There were about a dozen twins in her family tree that she knew about. It was in her genetic.
Claire said they were going to be the tiny reincarnations of the ones we lost. We lost two, but we got two back.
When she was pregnant I was always so careful with her. I wanted to carry her everywhere. I wanted to protect her from everything.
The doctors kept telling us that the best thing was for Claire to keep up with her routine. I didn't care. We were not losing those kids.
Every time we would go out I would keep a protective hand on her belly. Claire always made fun of me for it, but I knew she also loved it. We were both so worried.
This was it for us. If we had lost them, I know we never could have tried for another.
We named them Eloise and Eliah. Eloise for my mom. Eliah for Claire's grandfather.
At night sometimes we put them in the middle of our bed between us and we just stare at them sleeping, their little fists balling up to rub their little eyes, their tiny mouths forming a little circle while yawning, and then we smile at each other. I find myself crying while I look at them sometimes. I can't believe these two little human beings come from us. I can't believe Claire grew them inside her. I can't believe they're ours.
