Poems

Gone Again

You left
With half of my heart
Still in your pocket
Leaving me
To wonder what I did
What I could have done
Leaving me to hate you
With every fiber of my being
For a whole 3 months
Until finally I forgot you
And with the help of someone new
I rebuilt the part of me
You stole
The part I gave over to you
Willingly
Without considering the
Consequences
And a short 5 months later
You were forgotten
Erased from my memories
Like those two years never happened
And for the first time
In a long time
I was happy
But happiness can never last a life time
For 6 months later
You came back into my life
And I was flooded
With an overwhelming hatred
Hatred that I no longer though I had
Hatred that ripped my every limb
Gutted me
Left me with nothing but darkness
But along with hatred
Came that small,
Small part of me
That was still in love with you
The part of me that never truly went away
And for 3 months I could pretend you didn't exist
You weren't there for long
And you stayed long enough for me to be okay with you
To know you were alive
And know you were okay
And that's all I needed
All I wanted
All I could handle
Because I knew
If I let you back into my life like that again
It would kill me
So you were there
In the shadows
Placed on the back burner
For 3 more months
Until one day
I needed you
I cried for you
Because you were all I had left
All I could talk to
And just like that
You were gone
And I didn't know
When it was exactly
That you
Left again