How Do I
Natigilan ako. For a while, I forgot she existed and is pregnant with his child. Max’s child. Palagay ko ay may nakapasok na bubuyog sa puso ko and stung me through and through.
And it’s like another bee stung me on the same spot again when I heard him say, “Okay lang saken na magsungit si Carly handa naman akong suyuin siya.” Si Max.
Nag-ipon ako ng lakas para tignan siya.
Sila.
Ngunit sana ay hindi ko nalang ginawa. Hindi ko alam kung kailan pa ako naging masochist but I think it all started when I loved Max. Hanggang kailan ko naman kaya ito kayanin? Hanggang sa tuluyang mawala ang pagmamahal ko sakanya?
Paano ko nga ba siya minahal? Bakit ko siya minahal? Hindi ko alam. Ang alam ko ay isang araw natauhan na lamang ako na mahal ko na siya, hindi pala, kailangan pang isampal sa akin ni Krizzy ang katotohanang ito bago ko malaman.
Ang hirap pala ng ganoon, ano? Yung walang pasabi. Wala man lamang warning. Mahal mo na agad siya. Ni hindi ka nakapaghanda. Ngayon tuloy ay nangangapa ka kung papaano siya kakalimutan.
How do I unlove him?
How do I start over again?
Napakadaling tanong pero ang hirap sagutin lalo pa at nasa harap ko lamang siya kasama nang babaeng minsan na siguro niyang sinubukang kalimutan ngunit hindi niya nagawa.
Sana ay nasagot nung movie na ‘Starting Over Again’ ang tanong na ito. But, the only thing it implied was that, two former lovers needed proper closure in order to move on. In my situation, how can we have a closure when he doesn’t know I love him and when it was just a pseudo-relationship after all? It was all pretense!
“Why are you all staring at me?” tanong ko sa mga itonang mapansin na lahat ay nakatutok ang mga mata sa akin.
“You’re spacing out, Biancs.” Ani Yan.
“Am I? I’m sorry. I was just, uhm, I was…” tumingin ako kay Krizzy upang humingi ng saklolo. My mind is not working properly right now.
“She’s just affected with the recent rumors about her, ya know? Buhay showbiz.” Agad namang saklolo nito. Napabuntong hininga ako. Sa dinami-dami ba naman ng pwedeng idahilan?
“Oh yeah, I’ve read about that! There’s this rumor na Marco and Tasha broke up and it’s because of you daw? Totoo ba yon?” Alcy asked curiously.
Way to go, Krizzy! Niligtas mo nga ba ako o iniliko mo lang yung topic?
“Isn’t that the guy who starred in the movie ‘Dead Man’?” tanong naman ni Carly.
BINABASA MO ANG
The Greatest Pretender
Storie d'amoreBianca Sollen De La Rosa never thought she would find love when she agreed to be Max Montelibano's girlfriend. She was certain she will never fall in love with a guy like him. But she did. She fell hard unknowingly. Their show has ended but she stil...
