I went to a catholic school when I was younger. It was great, my first few years. I had steady friendship groups and then I didn't. So I sought friends outside of school to feel less alone and these friends made me feel okay to be me. But with the more influence they had on me, the more the girls from school noticed the changes in me that I wasn't able to hide.
They agreed on one thing. They thought I was gay.
There on that spot I felt pressured. I can still remember the intense anxiety that came over me.
I always knew that I liked girls. I pushed it down and pushed it down again and again telling myself I liked boys so I didn't need to like girls too. But i did.
And in that moment with everyone's eyes on my I felt intense fear.
It took me awhile after that to come to a similar conclusion that they had come to. I wasn't gay but I was (am) bisexual. I like girls and boys.
And some days, that moment pops into my head and I feel sick from how they made me feel outed before I even had the courage to come out myself.
YOU ARE READING
coffee stains
Poesíaa kaleidoscopic look at a life full of ups and downs, laid out in a poetic form. // highest rank: #4 in poetry // // other works include; l i t t l e n o t e s, highest rank: #1 in poetry and JESSICA // *cover by @flawed_stars_
