Countless || Key FF

Part 8 - River of tears

It's a day before I have my photoshoot with Key and we haven't talked since our kiss, a sigh leaves my mouth as I brush my pink hair, my hair was a light pink and I really love the colour. Dubu springs up my leg, I pet his little head and smile "I'll go for a walk with you in a bit okay?" Dubu is my new dog, I bought him somewhere and he is so adorable. I felt lonely in my apartment so why not buy a dog to give you company, right? I put on my jacket and get the leash for Dubu. He gets excited and follows me, I giggle and put his leash on. "Let's go buddy" I open the door and walk outside. My phone immediately starts ringing and a sigh leaves my mouth, why can't anyone just leave me alone for a second?
"With Hanaji?" I ask while I start walking, "Hanaji this is your manager, Dean we'll be expecting you and Key today in the room so you can start doing a live stream together to start promoting a bit" Dean says, his voice is stern but I understand why. "Yes sure, is it okay if I bring my dog?" I ask while I start walking back towards my car, "Yes Key will bring his dogs as well so he has buddies to play with."

I open the door and poke my head out, "Hi" I smile at Key who is sitting there with one of his dogs on his laps, Dubu runs into the room straight for his dogs. Then my eyes falls on his hair, it's the exact same colour as mine, "We're matching!" I walk into the room and sit down beside him, he nods, he has a smile on his face but it loos fake. "Okay guys, this v-live is for your fans and how you feel about working together" Dean walks towards us, "We'll be right here" He smiles, and I nod softly. There is something about him that makes me dislike him, Key also nods and we start the live.

"What is the most fun about working together?" Key reads the question from the tablet in front of him, he looks at me. "I think getting to know each other, since we have to see each other a lot" I smile at him and he nods. I look at the tablet in front of me, people have so many questions it's hard to answer all of them. "What is the one thing you like the most of one another?" I ask him while my eyes read the question, Key smiles. "I like Hanaji her honesty, she doesn't lie and the other thing about her is her smile, she is very pretty when she smiles" Key says, a blush creeps on my face. "What about you Hanaji, what do you like about Key?" Dean asks, he looks at me but I don't want to look at him. "The thing I like most about Key is his love for music, he is almost always in the studio and he produces such amazing songs. I respect that" I smile at Key and now it's his time to blush, "It might not be the best thing but that's what I like" My eyes look at my hands, Key puts his hand on mine and smiles. "It's the best I could wish for" He whispers it so only I can hear it, the blush on my face gets even redder and somehow the tension in the room disappears.

"Hanaji!" Key walks up to me, we just finished the live stream and he looks at me with a smile "Do you want to go for a walk with the dogs?" I nod and grab Dubu, they actually behaved while doing the live stream. They did sit on our laps for a while because they wanted some attention but they really did behave!
The cold air hits my face and a shiver runs down my spine, I put one of my hands in my pocket while my other one holds the leash of Dubu his line. "I wanted to ask you something" I look at Key, "Ask away" He smiles softly, "Why didn't we talk after the kiss? I mean I tried calling you but you never picked up" I say while I look at him, Key aims his gaze to the ground and he sighs. "I'm sorry I didn't know what to do and I didn't want to hurt you" He looks at me and our eyes meet, I missed his beautiful brown eyes. "But why?" I ask him carefully, he looks down once again and I put my hand on his shoulder. "It doesn't matter to me but don't forget we have a photoshoot together and we should work normally with each other, I don't know what I feel at the moment but we have to put that aside from everything for a second" I say while I look at him, Key shakes his head. "That's the point I can't like you Hanaji" Our eyes meet again, but this time his eyes are sad, filled with memories from the past, filled with pain. "What do you mean you can't?" I look at him, my hand falls beside my body again and Key looks at me. "I don't want to lose someone I love, not again" I wrap my arms around him, he stiffens by my sudden action but eventually wraps his arms around me, "Key you shouldn't worry about that, plus you can't change the way life goes" I say softly, Key his shoulders are shocking and soft cries are leaving his mouth, I look confused at him. I did not expect him to cry. "Hey it's okay!" I say carefully while I slowly rub his back, "It's just after Jonghyun I don't feel like I deserve any other love in my life because I just can't handle losing another person" Key says while sobbing.

I put a cup of tea in front of Key and smile softly, I took him home with me just because he couldn't stop crying. "I'm sorry you have to see me in a state like this" Key apologizes while he wipes his tears away with a tissue. "It's okay, it's not like we don't have a vulnerable side" I smile at him and sit down beside him. I ruffle his hair and he smiles softly towards me, his smile is so adorable.

"Can I ask something?" Key looks me in the eyes and I nod, "What did Juanhyu meant with don't fall into your old habits?" I gulp and look at the floor, I thought no one heard that. But apparently he did. "You don't have to tell me if it's too personal" Key says quickly while he sees my hesitant face, "No I want to tell you" I bite my lip, I'm looking to start the story with but there is no easy way to tell him.
"A few years ago I chose to be a model, but I didn't had the right weight so I had to lose a lot of it just to become the person everyone wanted to see me as" I begin, Key looks at me he clearly is interested in the story since we both don't know a lot about each other. "I became anorexic and was actually hospitalized multiple times before Juanhyu became my manager" My voice becomes shaky as I recall the memory, without Juanhyu there I would've died because of the amount underweight I had. He brought my life back at track and helped me stay there.
Tears are rolling down my cheeks and I look at Key, "I told you, we all have a vulnerable side" Key chuckles, his chuckle sounds deeper then before and he pulls me in a hug. "I'm glad you are okay now" I give in the hug, his hug is strong and nice. His cologne fills my nose and he smells so good! Oh god, why am I even thinking about his scent right now? He is making me feel better and that's the thing I think about? My eyes meet Key his eyes once again, "Do you want to stay over?" The question is out there before I can even stop myself, my eyes widen but Key only smiles and nods. "Sure."

"I definitely love you so much
I wanted to adjust everything to you
And live for you too"