Save Yourself from Me

Chapter 62

Riley's Pov

I felt like I was floating, there was no noise, no sound, no light, just nothingness, while I floated on for what felt like forever. After a while, it felt like there was poking in my head and the pain suddenly caused a rush of emotion and noise and bright lights that flashed by me.

Was I dead? There was a peace that washed over me as I sat and looked out at the vastness of all the soundwaves and images fly by. In this space I had control. I stopped an image of my parents and me when I was a kid, the only happy memory I have, just after Kye was born. I stared into the image as I felt the thread of emotions that were connected to it turn from a happy memory to a sad one.

As I flipped through more images and memories, I felt the presence of someone else, someone familiar, my mother stood next to me and held my hand, smiling, but saying nothing. As a particularly painful memory played, when I tried to kill myself in Andy's bathroom, my mom squeezed my hand and let a tear slide still without saying a word. She turned to face the sea of people that were behind us, my family and friends from the time I was young, a few faces I never met but have seen.

She hugged me and there was a whisper, "Go, be with him, be happy and we will keep you safe. No more demons or noises, no more haunting you." I voice I longed to hear, full of warmth and love with a smile on her lips, "I will keep your demons at bay. I'm sorry I never have, but this time, I will."

Before I am able to respond, there is a violent jolt and the world around me wavers, the noises crashing into each other, I'm losing control. Another jolt comes and I am yanked back from the peace of the moment to the hushed voice in the background and the faint heartbeat monitor.

My heart clenched and I thought that it was because I missed Andy, but when it clenched again, a voice came through, "She's back, we got her back. Let's finish and close before she flatlines again." I felt trapped, but no one could hear me and then it all came rushing back to me. Where I was and what is going on.

My body felt so heavy and I was so tired, that I must've fallen asleep, but when I woke up I still couldn' open my eyelids. I could hear Andy's voice though, calling my name, talking to me, begging me to stay and all I wanted was to be able to comfort him, but I couldn't.

I don't know how long I stayed like this, in a state of consciousness, with no movement, but I would hear the nurses come and check my machines. I would hear the doctor talking to Andy and checking on my progress, which seems like I've made none.

One of the things I noticed was that there were no loud noises, like before. The voices in my head were a hushed blur with the voices of reality and I wasn't sure what I felt more, loneliness or relief.

It must have been a few days and the frustration of just laying in this bed and not being able to look or talk to Andy was driving me insane, the doctor had just walked in and was talking Andy again when his voice suddenly boomed and my body jolted.

"It's been nearly 2 weeks, you said that this was a simple procedure and that she would be okay. What is going on?" I could hear the frustration and sadness in his voice and he sounded exhausted, he must have been, spending all his free time here over the last 2 weeks.

The frustration bubbled to the point that I felt like I was going to break down and I let out a scream, but nobody could hear me. The tears broke free and I was lost to the emotion of the hopelessness. I started thrashing m limbs in my mind until I was exhausted, losing my mind, trapped inside of it, the only place I never wanted to be stuck.

"I know how you feel Andrew, I am just as worried that she's taking this long to wake up. It may be the results of her flatlining, but she should be just fine, we need to give it time. The mind is tricky and takes the time it takes."

A sob resonated through the room and sank into my bones, I screamed his name once more and thrashed harder, then there was a gasp and I could feel the warmth of his hand stroke the wetness off my cheek, his voice a soft whisper, as he called to me once again, "Riley, baby, can you hear me?"

I desperately screamed, "Yes, yes I can hear you," but I wasn't sure he could hear me until the sandpaper in my throat scratched me as I called his name, "Andy". This time he squeezed my hand

"I'm right here baby, I'm right here." I felt the relief wash over me, at the acknowledgement. After a lot more effort than I ever thought it would take, I called his name again and willed my eyes to open, so I could see him.

"Nice to have you back Riley, I missed you so much." His voice wavered and I could feel the tears streaming down my face, the warm liquid leaving a trail. He kissed my cheek, capturing the salty tear before kissing my forehead and I put all my effort into smiling, as I looked at this beautiful man, I can't help but wonder who he is and where is Andy?