Lost love Pewdiepie x cry

Afraid

||Felix's POV||

I'm taking Ryan out to an amusement park and I have two reasons for this. One, because I want to spend time with the one I love and see him happy. And two, because I want him to forget about Ken. He dreamt about him last night. And as much as I dismissed the whole scenario, I was actually kinda jealous. And I didn't want to admit that, but it was true. I don't think anyone would feel good about their significant other dreaming about their former love. But, other than that, I really just want to have fun with Ryan. And nothing should get in the way of that.

We figured the best place to go have fun at was at Six Flags! They have crazy rides there! But... We're currently in Florida. So actually going there today would be kinda hard to do. The Six Flags closest to us was the one in Georgia. But even then it's a 5 hour drive. So that means road trip!! Ryan and I decided to start packing now so we could arrive there nice and early.

We both started to pack, joking along the way and ordering take away to enjoy as a break. It was getting late now, and Soon after while we were packing, Ryan went to the bathroom with something in his hands, but I was unable to see. I decided to investigate, slowly trailing my way to the bathroom door, I noticed the door was slightly opened, so I peeked through.

..He was wearing his cry mask.

||Ryan's POV||

My breath was shaky. Should I bring the mask with me? What would people think? Would they get the wrong idea and call authorities? These thoughts weren't anything new. These were reoccurring questions that I have constantly asked myself when leaving to do something as simple as grocery shopping. But.. As much as this mask brings me anxiety, it also helps me. It helps me hide from the judgemental world. I mean.. who would even want to look at this face? I know that Felix says that I look amazing, but what if he's lying? What if he doesn't actually feel that way? And is just saying that?

My hands shakily grab onto the mask, pulling it off slowly. I'm sweating, and my cheeks are flushed red. I suddenly feel a tear roll down and I quickly wipe it away.

"Stop it you idiot.." I whisper. I always do this. Why am I like this? Even though Felix makes me happy, depression doesn't disappear. It latches on, and only goes away when it wants... I hate this. Tears start rushing down even more.

"Ryan?"

My head shoots up and I look towards the bathroom door. Felix was standing there, a concerned look on his face. I cover my face.

"A-aha.. don't worry Felix I'm fine" I say, my voice quivering. Suddenly, I feel both my wrists grabbed and pulled towards Felix's face.

"Ryan, I'm your boyfriend. I'm here for a reason. I want you to be happy. Seeing you like this hurts me. Please tell me what's wrong" a blush forms, and tears roll down even more.

"I'm scared!" I yell out.. as if a cry for help. He looked at me in confusion, "Scared of what babe?" He asked in a soft tone. "I'm scared of myself! Im scared of this mask, I'm scared of the person I am. And I'm.. Scared of loosing you... I'm.. I'm just scared... of everything" I admit in defeat. I half expected Felix to laugh at me. But, he didn't. Instead, he hugged me. And I hugged back. He softly runs his fingers through my hair and I shiver at the touch.

"I'm not going anywhere Ryan. And you don't have to tell me why you're scared. But you can if you want, and I'll be sure to give my full attention to you. You are everything to me. And I never want to see you this way. You have me now. You're not alone."

My hands tightens on the back of his shirt and I bury my face into his chest. "I know" I manage to say, I suddenly feel a sense of relief, and I smile. I don't know what I'd do without him by my side. I'm still afraid. But having Felix by my side doesn't make me feel as afraid as before.

"I don't think.. I'll need that. To where we're going at least.. haha" we both shift our heads towards the cry mask, and Felix smiles. "I think we're done packing for the night. Let's go sleep." I intertwine my fingers with his, and we start heading to the bed. "Yeah.. I think I'd like that"

||Felix's POV||

*Later that night*

I lay there, next to Ryan playing with his soft, brown and silky hair while he lays there asleep. The moonlight shining through the curtains, giving Ryan a vulnerable, almost angelic look.

"I promise, although I may not know what you're going through now, I promise you that I will always be by your side, through thick and thin, through the ups and downs, sunny days and rainy thunderstorms. I will be there. I will always protect you. I love you Ryan" I whisper.

I softly grab on to Ryan's hand, and I feel his hand softly tighten on mine. I smile and look towards the ceiling. Ryan may have gone through some hard times, but I know that no matter what, I will be there to face the demons with him.

And with that thought, I fell asleep. Allowing Ryan's soft breathing and the darkness of the room overtake my senses.

||Authors note||
Heyooooo! Y'all thought I wasn't gonna update BUT I DID!! I know this chapter is a bit of a filler but either way I hope you enjoyed it. We'll get to the main plot eventually. Don't even sweat it dawg. Peace out!