The next morning I go to school,just like every other morning,I go to my locker and everyone stares,and whispers behind my back,like I can't see or hear it. Most of the time it makes me so angry and I want to shout "For fucks sake! I AM NOT A BAD PERSON!" But of course I never do,cause then,everyone will be be fully convinced I am the spawn of my mum and then my dad will never take me to live with him any longer because of how much of n embarresment I am.
It's a good thing Phil doesn't know why I want to die,or who my mum is,or at least I don't think he does,I feel like if he were to know,he would bail out of me because he will think i'm psycho or something,I don't think i'm ever going to tell him either. Yep I'm not going to.
I walk into my Language arts class,and sit down,even though the teachers are supposed to act friendly and try their best not to be rude and be helpful to the students,I know for a fact that all of them are as scared of me,as much as the students are in my class. Not even going to lie,I sorta feel bad for my classmates,they act like if they are near me or even touch me,they are going to turn into a crazy person,like crazy is a disease. I sit down,at the far table in the back,where no one can look at me,or be near me. The teacher goes on about a quote,a quote by John Green. There she writes the quote on the board.
"The thing about pain,is it demands to be felt."
She wrote in big block letters on the board.
"Who thinks they know what this means?" A silence fell apoun the class. I wanted to stand up and shout.
"Obviously he is fucking sad!" But of course I never did,because it never mattered to me,grades,nothing matter to me anymore,besides April 7th. When the bell rings I gather up my things and head to Physics class,it's honestly the only one I care for.
"Good Morning class! Today I have an announcment!" Mr.Williois says aloud. The class groans,but they aren't groans of boredom or them being pissed off of the fact tat they are tired and want to sleep,nope it's groans of scarce,of what Mr.Williois has to say.
"I will be signing you a project." Mr.Williois says aloud. The class crys of annoyance.
"And you will be working in partners." The class goes silent. Everyone knows we don't pick partners in this class,and I feel a bit bad for the person who will have to work with me,it may ruin their social life,and someone who doesn't really have one,it will ruin their chance of getting one. I hear whispers behind,to my left,to my right,in front of me,everyone is whispering about who might have to work with me.
"Okay,okay class,settle down,let me get the sticks.' He grabs a cup with popsicle sticks,he pulls out two sticks at the same time.
"Jessica and Lance." "Sabrina and Tayler." "Dan and.." The class gets really quiet,you can hear everyone's heartbeat speed up,I want to scream at them,but I don't.
"Dan and Lucas." My heart sink,I hear a couple gasp. Lucas is one of the most popular people in my school,and I,Dan Howell,am about to ruin that for him. Oh well.
"You will be going to the aquarium and taking pictures of animals with potential and kinetic energy. This will be due on April 17th."
Too bad i'm going to be dead.
YOU ARE READING
Our hearts are a black hole
Fanfiction*WARNING: CONTAINS TALK ABOUT SUICIDE AND MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMS ALONG WITH SELF HARM! DO NOT READ IF THESE ARE TRIGGERS! somewhat based off the book "My heart and other black holes" Dan is planning on committing suicide,because o what his mother...
