This was inspired by AerialKnight44 and the book she's writing titled "My Escape" and the part that's titled "The brother I Never Had." As soon as I read that, you inspired me to share this, so thank you A!
I do in fact have a brother, his first and middle name is John Kasen
(I can't include last name for confidential reasons because it's the same as mine).
The story is very similar to Aerial's story, except that I was 18 months old whenever my Mom found out she was pregnant. I don't remember a thing, only what my parents have told me.
The things I know about John are:
•He is a year younger than me
•He was a twin, but his other twin vanished very early in the pregnancy, which is called "Vanishing twin" and is quite common.
•He was a ginger
•Me and him looked almost identical and probably would have looked like twins today
•He was still born
For those of you who don't know what "Still born" means, it basically means he died in the womb before my mother gave birth.
The very odd part of this is, the night before my mom went to the hospital, the dog we had at the time, Bogey, he was standing at mom's feet looking away from her, growling and whining at something at something in the corner of our ceiling in our living room, teeth bared and hair up.
When my mom came home from the hospital the next day after just had giving birth, she went straight to her bedroom. Mom didn't even fool with the blankets, she just went in and laid down on her side on the bed and cried. As soon, and I mean as soon as she did that, Bogey hopped onto the bed and curled up next to mom's stomach where the baby would have been.
Next thing that happened was mom screamed from the bedroom at my dad that Bogey had knew what happened the night before. So for however long mom was in the bedroom for, Bogey laid curled up around mom's stomach and just whined.
That still gives me goosebumps every time I hear that or tell it.
Sometimes I feel his presence in my life. I get a little feeling like a poke or something, it's weird, but I know it's him. Sometimes I just feel his presence. There have been days I've felt nothing at all though. I still love him as if he were here physically. He's just in a different place. Maybe not here in the flesh, but here in a different sense. If that makes any remote sense at all... I'm really bad at explaining stuff lol.
I have cried because I've never gotten to meet him. The situation was bittersweet though. Mom said she felt like she had a whole in her heart, like something was missing, and she needed to give love to another being. My dad said that I'm still here and just pass that to me, but mom said she did love me with her entire heart, it just felt like something was still missing. So after about 3 years, mom found out she was pregnant again, this time with a girl.
Her name is Ari, she's 14, and sometimes annoying 😂
But I couldn't ask for any better sister because she's literally the greatest and I love her with my entire heart. I'd put my life before hers.
Mom was happy that the hole in her heart had been filled. Even though she still missed John, she found another reason for hope. Mom found a reason to smile though the bittersweet tears because then we wouldn't have Ari.
And that's basically a summary of what happened ❤
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