Crush Vision

Chapter 12

      I rip open another bag of marshmallows and place them on the table. Troy pokes the fire with a stick, giving Delaney time to sneak one off.

     "Hey, I saw that!" He whirls around and points at her. She just laughs and chews her marshmallow, walking off while he throws his stick into the flames. Jacob backs away.

    "I know it doesn't look like it, but I promise I actually know what I'm doing." Troy finds another branch and drags it to the center.

     "It's true; he's a Boy Scout." Delaney sets down a stack of paper plates as Jacob raises his eyebrow.

     I pick up one of the roasting sticks and toss it back and forth in my hands. "Are we cooking with these, or are you still going to burn your homework?"

     "Nah, I'll probably do it next year." Troy breaks the branch into smaller pieces before adding it to the pile.

    "What he really means is, nothing gets between him and his s'mores." Delaney grins and goes over to help him. I put the campfire fork back down and move to a log in front of the blaze, stretch my arms, and try to ignore the sticky feeling the bug spray left on my skin. Hannah's parents bring out grilled food as the sun begins to set.

     "Emmy's here!" Hannah slams a tray down on the table, jostling the chocolate and graham cracker squares.

     I stand and stumble over the log. A car door slams, and Emmy runs over to us just in time for me to save myself from tripping in front of her.

     "Hey guys!" She beams as she hugs the girls. "Sorry if I smell like animals."

     "Were you at the shelter again?" Hannah squeals. "You have to show me pictures!"

     Emmy grins. "Sure, but I'm almost out of storage."

     I walk over to them as she scrolls through her phone. Don't be awkward. Don't be awkward. "Hi."

     "Hi, Henry." Emmy looks up and lets Hannah take her phone. She smiles at me. My heart jumps, and I clear my throat.

    "Now that everyone's here, feel free to start eating." Hannah's dad raises his voice over his daughter in the background. "Delaney, look at these kittens—!"

     "Finally," Troy brushes off his hands and walks over. "I live for this stuff."

     We grab the grilled food first. I pop open a soda and move out of the way as Delaney and Emmy both sprint off with pieces of chocolate in their mouths.

     "Anarchy!" Jacob cries as he piles three hot dogs on his own plate.

     "You're one to talk." Hannah snorts.

     I sit down on the log, and for the first few minutes it's quiet as we're eating. The fire crackles in the darkening sky.

     Troy breaks the calm when he bolts up from his seat and races to make the first s'more.

     "Wow, you were right; I didn't realize he'd take it this seriously," I say as Delaney shakes her head.

     "I have to, since someone keeps eating the ingredients." He comes up behind us and puts his skewer into the fire.

    Jacob grabs a one for himself and thrusts it in the middle, charring his marshmallow black before pulling it out. "What, you don't like them burnt?"

    We shake our heads. He shrugs and swallows it whole as I finish my food and bring some more roasting sticks over. I hand a few to the girls, saving one for myself.

    "Thanks, Henry." Emmy's lips twitch up as she takes it. Delaney plucks her marshmallow off the tip and eats it raw, much to Troy's dismay. I search for a good spot and stick mine in the fire, furrowing my brow in concentration.

     The sound of humming drifts to my ears, and I glance across the campfire. Emmy slides a marshmallow onto her s'more and takes a bite. She laughs as it oozes onto her plate, trailing strings of sugar and melted chocolate. Emmy attempts to clean the mess with sticky hands, not really succeeding, but she smiles and goes to the table. As I watch her pass by, I hear the the fire spark and snap, and realize my marshmallow just slipped off my stick into the ashes. Troy and I barely have time to groan before a new one appears in front of me.

     "Here you go," Emmy drops the marshmallow into my hand. She sits down next to me, holding her skewer over the blaze. The firelight plays across her face and dances in her eyes. Smoke rises away from the cool air at my back. The heat sears my cheeks, turning them pink. I lean into the warm orange glow and glance at Emmy, exhaling as my heart beat quickens to match the small blue flames flickering at the center. I let the feeling sink in until a burning smell sets in my nostrils, then pull back.

     I start building my s'more as Emmy nibbles the corner of her second. She stares ahead quietly as she chews. Light and shadow paint her image. Emmy smiles and taps her foot, content.

     I taste the dessert for myself to distract from the butterflies in my stomach that float up to a buzz in my chest. Mmm, this one turned out just right. I lick the extra chocolate off my lips.

     Troy confiscates the bag of marshmallows from his sister and passed them around. We all stare at the fire again. Sparks leap out from its depths and climb high in the air before they fizzle back to earth. The buzz in my chest turns into a tightness. My fist clenches around the roasting fork as I try to figure it out. I focus on the frenzy of butterflies, but I suspect that has more to do with the beautiful girl next to me than anything else.

   My cheeks flush deeper, and I'm grateful for the cover of the fire. It's not only that we're sitting so close; it's the fact that when we're together we don't even have to say anything—like right now. We can sit in silence and just be.

     It's the being that makes my feelings surge so strong; seizing any time I can spend with Emmy and learn more about her, those scary yet thrilling moments that make my heart want to burst out of my ribcage. I want these feelings to spill over and to keep them a secret to myself all at the same time. They keep cycling through, fighting between overflowing and fizzling out.

     Emmy sighs and stretches, lulled by the fire's warmth. She peeks over at me, and I return her smile, wishing I could find the words somewhere inside me to tell her that her smile is nice, that there's a small smear of chocolate on her chin and it's sort of cute how she hasn't noticed yet, that her hand is right next to mine on the log...but a different pang runs through my chest in a hard ache of fear. She doesn't even know I'm thinking any of this; the only way for her to know is to tell her...

     My tongue and mouth clamp shut as thoughts rush into my mind, but there's a bubble of happiness tugging against them. Maybe I shouldn't write it off as futile just yet. Emmy's here, next to me, and she's happy. Somehow, that puts my mind at ease, and the possibilities of the future fade away. I'm not entirely sure what will happen—but right now, she's smiling, so I do, too.