The hardest things about dealing with this is the anxiety that it sticks itself to you like glue and breaks you down to bone and destroys you.
Every time I think about it hard to breath just of the though of it kills me
And I don't know what to do
It this burden that will never ever go away
No matter how much therapy I get it will never go away wether it's a small feeling or overwhelming like a tsunami it's never really gone.
Wether you don't show it or its visible from miles away it's alway there no matter what!
There is know getting rid of it
Your personal stalker
It
Will
Alway
Be
There
And I feel like I don't deserve anything
I don't deserve to be happy
I don't deserve to be sad
I don't deserve to be loved
I don't deserve to not be in pain
This is my fault
So I deserve to die
I am alive but I don't feel that way
Just a sad soul trapped in a willing body that decided to give up
It gets to the point where everything is a struggle
Waking up hurts
Knowing I have to carry on
It's disappointing
Knowing I'm a monster
Turning into a demon
I feel like a butterfly without wings
A ballon without air
A person
Without the will to even live
And then I laugh at how dumb stupid pointless pathetic miserable feeble sad tragic ridiculous petty worthless laughable and useless my existence is. I have met on a handful of the seven billon people on the planet visited five countries
And I'm here
Stuck
At the age of a teen
Being pressured
To make
The decisions
Of my futre
AND YOUR HERE QUESTIONING WHY I CUT
and
I'm
done
