Life sucks
Officially
It feels like I can't think about anyone one I love without my bottom lip trembling because of how useless I feel. I can't explain any of the shit inside my head without confusing myself.
Anxiety just permanently took over my heart.
Now I feel like constantly throwing up, think about what other think of me way to much and my confidence levels have dropped. Even if my peers can't see it. I'm not fighting back anymore. Letting the panic attacks and nervous episodes crash over me like brutal waves.
It's all your fault
Everything always is.
I'm going crazy
I don't even know what I'm doing
I can feel this burning rising in my chest and I just want to scream. People think I should have a great life
Parents still together
Loads of money
Free will
But I'm cornered by my parents
Money means nothing
And I'm trapped in my own body
I want to crawl out and be somebody else
Anywhere but here
You may know about how people say put your worries into ballon
Let it go
I blow into it different colours swirled in this clear balloon
Each with a different face
I tied it
And it sat there in my hand
It's not that couldn't let go
It's that I wouldn't
These worry's that have been buried inside me for years
They don't just go away
To much self hate I said
To much pain I say
To much suffering I mutter
To attached I whisper
